I'm on an internet list. One of the list members posted that her sister was injured in a house fire. Injured to the point that she is sedated against the pain. Injured to the point where her lungs are seared. The sister lost everything including her pets and has no insurance.
I couldn't sleep the night I found out about this all. I would not wish a house fire on ANYONE. Here is one that involved loss of life and an injured woman. I got off easy in comparison but it still it haunts me. I wonder if it will always haunt me. i really do not need something else playing with my head and no matter how much I tell my head to leave me alone, it won't.
I really can't do anything to help the list member and her sister but I did send some suggestions for the injured woman's daughters to help them with the mess afterwards. It's not much but I am glad I had something to offer and if what I learned in my aftermath. This way I feel that all that I lost was not in vain.
And then this morning, still racked by the horror of a fire injury, I looked around my new bedroom and sighed. Then I smiled and then I threw my arms wide and announced as loudly as I could "Bedroom, I LOVE YOU!" I do, I love the bed room and the craft room (though the paint I chose is a bit too dark) and the living room and the kitchen. No paneling anywhere and sun, sun streaming in through doors and windows. I LOVE MY HOUSE! Even the plain white bedroom and the off white laundry room. I love my deck and my bay window and my yellow walls. I have little furniture on which to place Christmas decorations but I decorated the top of my kitchen cabinets and ...well... I love my kitchen.
So if I keep all of this firmly in my head, I will beat my fire memories. I will learn to accept what I lost but I doubt that I will ever stop looking for Isabella the cat that went missing.
Even so... things could have been so much worse. I hope that sometime in the future the list member's sister can come to terms with all that happened to her. I wish for her to have a day when she sees something new in her life that she loves and wouldn't have had without the fire.
Without the fire I would still be in my dark house with its accumulation of years of possessions and not this light airy sparse house where I have made thing JUST THE WAY I WANT THEM! What more could anyone want?
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Remissszzzzz
I haven't written in some time and I have no excuse. NO EXCUSE!!! I could make up one. I could blame Hurricane Sandy or that I'm too busy decorating the newly rebuilt house or I was kidnapped by elves and just now managed to gnaw my way through the ropes that held me.
Anyway.... I'M HERE NOW!!!
The house is beautiful. The colors are wonderful even if it is somewhat like living in a pinata. We didn't buy a whole lot of furniture... truthfully the house is so small there isn't any room for a lot of furniture. I still haven't found the perfect thing for the living room wall tho finding a throw for the back of the couch has taken away the turd look of it. Did look like that in a store but there in my peach living room it was like Godzilla took a dump in my living room. The throw helps
I've also discovered wall decals and if I'm not careful the house will be covered with them but how can I resist? STICKERS for WALLS!!! My favorite I think is the little blue fairy door I got from Wilson Graphics on Etsy. There are decals in the kitchen and in the eat in kitchen part and in the living room, hall, bedrooms and the craft room. I'm not slapping up any old thing, I think this through carefully.
This is all new to me. I never put together a house before. Even when we first got married we each had bits of furniture that followed us through the years. Nothing matched and there was so much of it so this has been rather hard for me. I am so afraid of making a mistake even if it is my own home. Now that I have the last of the Ikea Furniture assembled I may take a crack at photographing the whole house.
We have a new deck out back that reminds me of a tree house. It really isn't up that high but whenever I am on it I think tree house. It's a custom built deck and so sturdy I think it could withstand almost anything.
We got really lucky with our contractor. I've heard all kind of dreadful contractor stories but our rebuild went fairly easily. Our contractor had told us early on that he rarely got the chance to rebuild from the ground up... so to speak. We had our walls from the old house but everything else was replaced including roof. Boy is this house built solidly. During Hurricane Sandy we didn't wobble or shimmy or shiver or shake. The walls didn't rattle. The only sound from outside was one of those peculiar moaning wind type of sounds that always makes me think of winter snowstorms. We lost power and I had problems with the sump pump but the contractor talked me through what I needed to do and we stayed nice and dry. We even got a generator with left over house contents money and when the neighborhood was out we had fridges, sump pump, a lamnp and TV and Internet and were even able to share some of our electricity with the best neighbors in the world when the pull string on their generator broke.
The dogs are thrilled with their new home. They love the idea of all those doors and while they may go out the front door, we never really know which door they will want to come in. There is even a doggy door in the basement door but Kali is the only one who uses it. Charlie will go through it if I hold the flap open but nothing stops Kali. She'll be in the house, hear Charlie bark then she's off mumbling to herself as she runs downstairs and out the door. When she comes in, she comes to find one of us and grins at us until we tell her how clever she is and then she settles down, Charlie barks and off she goes again.
Charlie is an outdoorsy sort of dog. He didn't even mind going out into the hurricane and would have been quite content to sit on the porch in the driving rain. Nasty us made him come in where it was dry. He's jsut lucky I didn't make him put on a sweater or a rain coat. What Charlie loves as much as sitting on the porch is sitting on his mound. We had dirt delivered to landscape around the base of the house to draw rain water away from the house instead of into the basement. A huge pile was delivered, spread about and still there was a pile. Eventually we had the pile moved to the front of the house under a tree and Charlie just adores the mound. He stands on the mound, sits on the mound and yesterday lounged on the mound. I'm sure if it snows he'll be sitting on the mound in the snow. Of course it looks rather odd to have a pile of dirt in front of the house for the dog but well.... it's us. Why wouldn't we have a mound of dirt for our dog?
So that;s about it for now. Stay odd my friends.
Anyway.... I'M HERE NOW!!!
The house is beautiful. The colors are wonderful even if it is somewhat like living in a pinata. We didn't buy a whole lot of furniture... truthfully the house is so small there isn't any room for a lot of furniture. I still haven't found the perfect thing for the living room wall tho finding a throw for the back of the couch has taken away the turd look of it. Did look like that in a store but there in my peach living room it was like Godzilla took a dump in my living room. The throw helps
I've also discovered wall decals and if I'm not careful the house will be covered with them but how can I resist? STICKERS for WALLS!!! My favorite I think is the little blue fairy door I got from Wilson Graphics on Etsy. There are decals in the kitchen and in the eat in kitchen part and in the living room, hall, bedrooms and the craft room. I'm not slapping up any old thing, I think this through carefully.
This is all new to me. I never put together a house before. Even when we first got married we each had bits of furniture that followed us through the years. Nothing matched and there was so much of it so this has been rather hard for me. I am so afraid of making a mistake even if it is my own home. Now that I have the last of the Ikea Furniture assembled I may take a crack at photographing the whole house.
We have a new deck out back that reminds me of a tree house. It really isn't up that high but whenever I am on it I think tree house. It's a custom built deck and so sturdy I think it could withstand almost anything.
We got really lucky with our contractor. I've heard all kind of dreadful contractor stories but our rebuild went fairly easily. Our contractor had told us early on that he rarely got the chance to rebuild from the ground up... so to speak. We had our walls from the old house but everything else was replaced including roof. Boy is this house built solidly. During Hurricane Sandy we didn't wobble or shimmy or shiver or shake. The walls didn't rattle. The only sound from outside was one of those peculiar moaning wind type of sounds that always makes me think of winter snowstorms. We lost power and I had problems with the sump pump but the contractor talked me through what I needed to do and we stayed nice and dry. We even got a generator with left over house contents money and when the neighborhood was out we had fridges, sump pump, a lamnp and TV and Internet and were even able to share some of our electricity with the best neighbors in the world when the pull string on their generator broke.
The dogs are thrilled with their new home. They love the idea of all those doors and while they may go out the front door, we never really know which door they will want to come in. There is even a doggy door in the basement door but Kali is the only one who uses it. Charlie will go through it if I hold the flap open but nothing stops Kali. She'll be in the house, hear Charlie bark then she's off mumbling to herself as she runs downstairs and out the door. When she comes in, she comes to find one of us and grins at us until we tell her how clever she is and then she settles down, Charlie barks and off she goes again.
Charlie is an outdoorsy sort of dog. He didn't even mind going out into the hurricane and would have been quite content to sit on the porch in the driving rain. Nasty us made him come in where it was dry. He's jsut lucky I didn't make him put on a sweater or a rain coat. What Charlie loves as much as sitting on the porch is sitting on his mound. We had dirt delivered to landscape around the base of the house to draw rain water away from the house instead of into the basement. A huge pile was delivered, spread about and still there was a pile. Eventually we had the pile moved to the front of the house under a tree and Charlie just adores the mound. He stands on the mound, sits on the mound and yesterday lounged on the mound. I'm sure if it snows he'll be sitting on the mound in the snow. Of course it looks rather odd to have a pile of dirt in front of the house for the dog but well.... it's us. Why wouldn't we have a mound of dirt for our dog?
So that;s about it for now. Stay odd my friends.
Monday, October 8, 2012
The Bodkinz is still oddz
We received our salvaged possessions from serv pro. 27 boxes of comics and 7 boxes of not comics. So what was IN those 7 boxes? H handful of useless keys wrapped as if they were made out of spun glass. Why useless? Because the doors they fit no longer exist being either burned or shattered by the firemen. A clutch of rusted grilling tools. I've needed more iron in my system. A dented collander, a frying pan with a wobbly handle, a pile of old mail from 3 years ago, loose photos now all stuck together. Framed photos and a mildewed wedding album. No clothes, no trophy of Josh's that I was promised would be returned, nothing that I would actually want, other than photos. I was enraged and would have torn somone's head off if I could. I should have been more demanding and insisted on seeing what they were taking away instead of assuming they knew what they were doing. A pox on them.
I got over my fury with a nap and a bit of crafting and I think we will all be pleased to know is that the one thing not damaged by the fire is the gravity in the craftroom. It isn't even the same craft room and yet the gravity there works like it did in my original craft room. Craft room gravity sucks the stuff off tables and shelves no matter how carefully I place it. Good thing to know some things never change.
Unfortunately though, I think my angels have been displaced. Whenever I took photos in a certain spot in the house, I would always have orbs. Same spot post fire and no orbs. No orbs anywhere in the house, unfortunately. I did uncover the angel shrine that I had made that the orbs were always around. Now I need to take a pic to see if the orbs follow the shrine and not the spot in the house. It always made me feel better Knowing I had angels.
Some angels, people might think, they let your house burn. Perhaps, but the angels made sure we all got out and no one was hurt. I can't ask anything more of them other than to come home, we miss you.
I got over my fury with a nap and a bit of crafting and I think we will all be pleased to know is that the one thing not damaged by the fire is the gravity in the craftroom. It isn't even the same craft room and yet the gravity there works like it did in my original craft room. Craft room gravity sucks the stuff off tables and shelves no matter how carefully I place it. Good thing to know some things never change.
Unfortunately though, I think my angels have been displaced. Whenever I took photos in a certain spot in the house, I would always have orbs. Same spot post fire and no orbs. No orbs anywhere in the house, unfortunately. I did uncover the angel shrine that I had made that the orbs were always around. Now I need to take a pic to see if the orbs follow the shrine and not the spot in the house. It always made me feel better Knowing I had angels.
Some angels, people might think, they let your house burn. Perhaps, but the angels made sure we all got out and no one was hurt. I can't ask anything more of them other than to come home, we miss you.
Monday, October 1, 2012
Vacation
We were away on vacation last week. Did ya miss me?
Anyhoo, we went to the beach. Yes, an Oddz Bodkinz vacation where one goes to the beach AFTER the season and when one forfeits bathing suits for sweat shirts.
The first night there most of the boardwalk was open (this is Wildwood, NJ). I hit a dollar store only to discover the lamest merchandize EVER! It was as if they swept the floor of all the stores and stuck the crap that they swept up on these shelves and walls. It's pretty pitiful when you can't find one thing to buy at the dollar store.
I didn't hit any more stores that night but the Husband bought himself a pound of candy. Now I know we haven't been on vacation in a while but when did chocolate candy cost $22.00 a pound??
So Wildwood Baordwalk was a bust. We hit Cape May the next day and trolled the stores in what they call the Mall... Out doors, gifty, that kind of thing. I bought only two things there when usually we come a staggering back unable to carry our loot. I don't know if I lost the taste for shopping, for the beach, or did I just NOT want to be there but at home in my new.old house.
We headed home on Tuesday and I was never so glad to leave the beach in my life. The whole area just didn't feel right. It was hard to equate the vacation Wildwood with the one where there were no... and I mean NO cars on the streets after dark. No people either when this place usually keeps going until the early hours. It felt almost like a post apocalyptic movie set where manhole covers bite at your ankles and sharks are swimming in your toilet. and youdon't dare look behind you for fear of what is lurking. In fact, the most exciting thing to happen was two gorups of hot bodied young coast guard guys that came jogging past singing aloud some kind of cadence that kept them all on the same beat. And that was only once. I must say that coast guard guys, young ones, at least have great butts. HEY! I wasn't looking. I happened to be sitting in the car as they came past and is it my fault that their butts were the same level as my eyes/ Well, except for the tall ones.
I am glad to be home, even tho still don't have the house set up perfectly. I'm in dire need of some artwork for my walls. Out big brown couch doesn't look so much like a turd since I bought a throw for the back of it and the cat peed on my bedspread so my bedroom smells a bit icky but it doesn't matter I'M HOME!!! And I'm not leaving EVER!!!
So there isn't much else new. I almost had a new laptop but the one bought for me had a cracked screen so I must wait for a new lap top. One that will hopefully turn on unlike the old one which is finally dying of the fire damage.
Speaking of fire damage. Serv Pro is bringing the stuff they managed to save to us on Thursday. I have no idea what they have so I guess it'll be like Christmas and I'll have surprizez. Till then......
Anyhoo, we went to the beach. Yes, an Oddz Bodkinz vacation where one goes to the beach AFTER the season and when one forfeits bathing suits for sweat shirts.
The first night there most of the boardwalk was open (this is Wildwood, NJ). I hit a dollar store only to discover the lamest merchandize EVER! It was as if they swept the floor of all the stores and stuck the crap that they swept up on these shelves and walls. It's pretty pitiful when you can't find one thing to buy at the dollar store.
I didn't hit any more stores that night but the Husband bought himself a pound of candy. Now I know we haven't been on vacation in a while but when did chocolate candy cost $22.00 a pound??
So Wildwood Baordwalk was a bust. We hit Cape May the next day and trolled the stores in what they call the Mall... Out doors, gifty, that kind of thing. I bought only two things there when usually we come a staggering back unable to carry our loot. I don't know if I lost the taste for shopping, for the beach, or did I just NOT want to be there but at home in my new.old house.
We headed home on Tuesday and I was never so glad to leave the beach in my life. The whole area just didn't feel right. It was hard to equate the vacation Wildwood with the one where there were no... and I mean NO cars on the streets after dark. No people either when this place usually keeps going until the early hours. It felt almost like a post apocalyptic movie set where manhole covers bite at your ankles and sharks are swimming in your toilet. and youdon't dare look behind you for fear of what is lurking. In fact, the most exciting thing to happen was two gorups of hot bodied young coast guard guys that came jogging past singing aloud some kind of cadence that kept them all on the same beat. And that was only once. I must say that coast guard guys, young ones, at least have great butts. HEY! I wasn't looking. I happened to be sitting in the car as they came past and is it my fault that their butts were the same level as my eyes/ Well, except for the tall ones.
I am glad to be home, even tho still don't have the house set up perfectly. I'm in dire need of some artwork for my walls. Out big brown couch doesn't look so much like a turd since I bought a throw for the back of it and the cat peed on my bedspread so my bedroom smells a bit icky but it doesn't matter I'M HOME!!! And I'm not leaving EVER!!!
So there isn't much else new. I almost had a new laptop but the one bought for me had a cracked screen so I must wait for a new lap top. One that will hopefully turn on unlike the old one which is finally dying of the fire damage.
Speaking of fire damage. Serv Pro is bringing the stuff they managed to save to us on Thursday. I have no idea what they have so I guess it'll be like Christmas and I'll have surprizez. Till then......
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
I Know
I know I whined and moaned about wanting to go back home. I couldn't wait. Was impatient and antsy all in one and now that I'm home I wonder when it will start feeling like home. Right now I'm getting that rental vibe. Maybe because I don't have much to put on the walls and they look so bare. Or, maybe, because it is so clean and clutter free. Well, for me clutter free. Right now I have things that need to be put away but nothing to put them in but I should be getting my IKEA stuff soon.
Having been in the house for so long, almost 30 years, there was a real mish mosh look to what I fondly referred to as decoratig. There was no rhyme or reason, nothing matched stuff I made was everywhere. Now I find myself matching stuff and I wonder if I'm channeling the Stepford neighbors from the rental house.
For instance... my bedroom is a pale moss green. My sheets match the walls, the comforter on top has a white background with a loose stylized leaf design. Some leaves match the walls other are beige to match the floor. The woodwork is white, as if the book case and the dresser will be white as well. I found matching green valances at the dollar store and these crazy vines with fuzzy green leaves, clear crystals and a hint of lavender. I obught myself a table at pier one to use as a night stand with a clear top and the base is metal branches with leaves and a small bird perched on one branch. I'm even getting a white decal to use as a head board that carries through the leaf and branch theme. I'm starting to scare myself. I never had anything match anything before and now I find myself bothered by the fact that one bath mat in the bathroom doesn't match the other rug by the sink and the towels. Heaven forfend!!! I think I need to go lie down.
The best next door neighbor in the world gave me some cute ceramics that will grace the top of my cabinets, now that I have a stepstool, only the tops of the cabinets are recessed and I now need to find a slat of wood or something to raise them so I can enjoy the look of them. I have put some of my polymer clay people I saved as well a a few smaller knick knacks on the kitchen windowsill and JOsh actually told me that he liked the way I was decorating the kitchen. I guess my little clay people are a reminder of home how it used to be.
Meanwhile the dogs are having a pisser of a time in the yard. The deck is coming along but the rain has stiopped work on that..
Speaking of work. The workmen I have encountered during this take as much pride in their work as they would if they were building their own home and not one for a stranger. I've noticed little touches like a soap dispenser in the kitchen sink, the pull down lights over the breakfast bar, the marvelous sump pump. I know we all hear of horror stories about contractors but I am thrilled with my guys and the job they are doing. So, I suppose all around I did get lucky.
Now if Michael has the same luck at court tomorrow all will be well.
That's it for As the Head Whirls.
Having been in the house for so long, almost 30 years, there was a real mish mosh look to what I fondly referred to as decoratig. There was no rhyme or reason, nothing matched stuff I made was everywhere. Now I find myself matching stuff and I wonder if I'm channeling the Stepford neighbors from the rental house.
For instance... my bedroom is a pale moss green. My sheets match the walls, the comforter on top has a white background with a loose stylized leaf design. Some leaves match the walls other are beige to match the floor. The woodwork is white, as if the book case and the dresser will be white as well. I found matching green valances at the dollar store and these crazy vines with fuzzy green leaves, clear crystals and a hint of lavender. I obught myself a table at pier one to use as a night stand with a clear top and the base is metal branches with leaves and a small bird perched on one branch. I'm even getting a white decal to use as a head board that carries through the leaf and branch theme. I'm starting to scare myself. I never had anything match anything before and now I find myself bothered by the fact that one bath mat in the bathroom doesn't match the other rug by the sink and the towels. Heaven forfend!!! I think I need to go lie down.
The best next door neighbor in the world gave me some cute ceramics that will grace the top of my cabinets, now that I have a stepstool, only the tops of the cabinets are recessed and I now need to find a slat of wood or something to raise them so I can enjoy the look of them. I have put some of my polymer clay people I saved as well a a few smaller knick knacks on the kitchen windowsill and JOsh actually told me that he liked the way I was decorating the kitchen. I guess my little clay people are a reminder of home how it used to be.
Meanwhile the dogs are having a pisser of a time in the yard. The deck is coming along but the rain has stiopped work on that..
Speaking of work. The workmen I have encountered during this take as much pride in their work as they would if they were building their own home and not one for a stranger. I've noticed little touches like a soap dispenser in the kitchen sink, the pull down lights over the breakfast bar, the marvelous sump pump. I know we all hear of horror stories about contractors but I am thrilled with my guys and the job they are doing. So, I suppose all around I did get lucky.
Now if Michael has the same luck at court tomorrow all will be well.
That's it for As the Head Whirls.
Monday, September 17, 2012
Lordy, Lordy, Lordy
I am so tired I could sleep forever and a day. Rip Van Winkle shove over.
I thought once we were back home thingz would settle down. Who would have imagined that there would still be so much to do, even without owning practically nothing? We are slowly making our way to the finish line but it's anyone's guess if I'll be awake to see the finish line.
The furniture rental people are picking up the rental furniture today... nearly now, in fact.
The cleaning service is coming in tomorrow late afternoon to clean.
Big TV and freezer are being delivered tomorrow as well.
Wednesday is walk through of the house we left.
Meanwhile not only do we need drapes but shades on the windows would be nice. Only I'd be the one stuck putting them up and I am a wonder with a hammer. Such as... I wonder why anyone trusted me with a hammer and I wonder if anyone will notice the 45 degree angle and I wonder fi we really need these damned things at all. Right now I'm using poster board as a rudimentary shutter
I'm waiting on a delivery of furniture from IKEA. It would be good to have something to put my underwear in other than tote bags from Michaels. I'm using the one with the zebra print.
We need to go grocery shopping. We need to put a tv stand together for tomorrows big TV arrival. I need to sort the craft room once I get the furniture... and the husband wants to go away for a few days next week so we can recoup from the move. WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want to go away as much as I want my neighbors to see me in the altogether as I climb out of the tub. I wonder how fast I can clone myself.
Oh and with all of this I need to put in some extra hours at the business to catch up onthe days I missed last week.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the guys are working steadily on the deck and the siding also gets done this week. I had to make some serious decisions as to where to put the deck steps and where did I want the left over dirt shoveled. Right now I'm thinking to move the pile out of the drive way but make another pile somewhere and leave it for the dogs because Charlie does so love sitting on it surveying his kingdom. Inside there are a few things that need to be touched up and that should be that... till the lanscapers come to tackle the bamboo jungle in the backyard.
and yet
I LOVE MY NEW HOUSE!!!!!
Yes, it's small but it is so clean and uncluttered and it's home.
The dogs are thrilled. I think Kali grinned for the first week and charlie spends the majority of his time outside. A doggy door will be installed in the basement outside door so the dogs can let themselves in and out to their hearts' content. Charlie has also spent the past two days barking. Not at anything in particular but simply because I'm not telling him to shush. We tried to keep them fairly quiet at the rental and now he can let it rip. I figure by Thursday he should be all barked out.
I;'ve also managed to put up a few touches to make the place mine. Wall stickers and this twiny branchy things I found at Michael's for 79cents... original price $7.99. The branchy things have a new home above the bedroom windows and the decals are in the craft room, kitchen and at the end of the hallway. That decal was sujpposed to go into the bedroom but I didn't like it there and it looks so much better where it is. the builder even thought I had painted it there. Nope wall sticker... on ebay... free shipping under $5. But my favorite decal is a little blue fairy door ( from wilson graphics on Etsy) that is tucked away at the bottom of a wall, all ready for the fairies, or Borrowers or Gremlins BECAUSE even with the fire home still has its quirky whatevers that love to keep me guessing and fiddle with teh gravity in the craft room.
I have a solar powered dancing hula girl in my garden window. I have her facing me and she shakes her hips all day long. When it gets dark, she stops and not even overhead lights can stir her. So why, for the past three mornings I find her sideways. (no the remaining cat does not get into that window) I straighten her out each evening before I go to bed and first thing in the morning there she is, sideways. Sort of a cosmic gotcha I suppose. It does, however tell me I am at home.
I did buy a new camera and I will be taking pics but I want to wait till all is settled and I'm no longer hobbling around like a crazy woman.
There is some good to all of this. I find myself doing a lot less craft shopping. First of all I got some wonderful craft goodies from friends but now I find myself looking at something that I MIGHT use SOMETIME and say no thanks. Me! Me who used to have the girls that came to thehouse to visit my sons SHOP in my craft room is now saying thank you but I do not need more. Except for Halloween ephemera because I lost my second Halloween glue book in the fire and I want to try and replace it. But even with that, I think I have enough. Who woulda thunk it.
So I guess we won't be seeing me on an episode of Hoarders.
And that's it for this episode of... As the Head Whirls.
I thought once we were back home thingz would settle down. Who would have imagined that there would still be so much to do, even without owning practically nothing? We are slowly making our way to the finish line but it's anyone's guess if I'll be awake to see the finish line.
The furniture rental people are picking up the rental furniture today... nearly now, in fact.
The cleaning service is coming in tomorrow late afternoon to clean.
Big TV and freezer are being delivered tomorrow as well.
Wednesday is walk through of the house we left.
Meanwhile not only do we need drapes but shades on the windows would be nice. Only I'd be the one stuck putting them up and I am a wonder with a hammer. Such as... I wonder why anyone trusted me with a hammer and I wonder if anyone will notice the 45 degree angle and I wonder fi we really need these damned things at all. Right now I'm using poster board as a rudimentary shutter
I'm waiting on a delivery of furniture from IKEA. It would be good to have something to put my underwear in other than tote bags from Michaels. I'm using the one with the zebra print.
We need to go grocery shopping. We need to put a tv stand together for tomorrows big TV arrival. I need to sort the craft room once I get the furniture... and the husband wants to go away for a few days next week so we can recoup from the move. WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want to go away as much as I want my neighbors to see me in the altogether as I climb out of the tub. I wonder how fast I can clone myself.
Oh and with all of this I need to put in some extra hours at the business to catch up onthe days I missed last week.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the guys are working steadily on the deck and the siding also gets done this week. I had to make some serious decisions as to where to put the deck steps and where did I want the left over dirt shoveled. Right now I'm thinking to move the pile out of the drive way but make another pile somewhere and leave it for the dogs because Charlie does so love sitting on it surveying his kingdom. Inside there are a few things that need to be touched up and that should be that... till the lanscapers come to tackle the bamboo jungle in the backyard.
and yet
I LOVE MY NEW HOUSE!!!!!
Yes, it's small but it is so clean and uncluttered and it's home.
The dogs are thrilled. I think Kali grinned for the first week and charlie spends the majority of his time outside. A doggy door will be installed in the basement outside door so the dogs can let themselves in and out to their hearts' content. Charlie has also spent the past two days barking. Not at anything in particular but simply because I'm not telling him to shush. We tried to keep them fairly quiet at the rental and now he can let it rip. I figure by Thursday he should be all barked out.
I;'ve also managed to put up a few touches to make the place mine. Wall stickers and this twiny branchy things I found at Michael's for 79cents... original price $7.99. The branchy things have a new home above the bedroom windows and the decals are in the craft room, kitchen and at the end of the hallway. That decal was sujpposed to go into the bedroom but I didn't like it there and it looks so much better where it is. the builder even thought I had painted it there. Nope wall sticker... on ebay... free shipping under $5. But my favorite decal is a little blue fairy door ( from wilson graphics on Etsy) that is tucked away at the bottom of a wall, all ready for the fairies, or Borrowers or Gremlins BECAUSE even with the fire home still has its quirky whatevers that love to keep me guessing and fiddle with teh gravity in the craft room.
I have a solar powered dancing hula girl in my garden window. I have her facing me and she shakes her hips all day long. When it gets dark, she stops and not even overhead lights can stir her. So why, for the past three mornings I find her sideways. (no the remaining cat does not get into that window) I straighten her out each evening before I go to bed and first thing in the morning there she is, sideways. Sort of a cosmic gotcha I suppose. It does, however tell me I am at home.
I did buy a new camera and I will be taking pics but I want to wait till all is settled and I'm no longer hobbling around like a crazy woman.
There is some good to all of this. I find myself doing a lot less craft shopping. First of all I got some wonderful craft goodies from friends but now I find myself looking at something that I MIGHT use SOMETIME and say no thanks. Me! Me who used to have the girls that came to thehouse to visit my sons SHOP in my craft room is now saying thank you but I do not need more. Except for Halloween ephemera because I lost my second Halloween glue book in the fire and I want to try and replace it. But even with that, I think I have enough. Who woulda thunk it.
So I guess we won't be seeing me on an episode of Hoarders.
And that's it for this episode of... As the Head Whirls.
Monday, September 10, 2012
Sometimes my heart just hurts.
Read on Facebook this morning that my youngest (almost 30) vomited blood this morning. I called him immediately but only got voice mail and when I opened my hotmail, he had emailed me. I haven't heard anything since and my mind is racing to the point where I now have a headache.
Double digits and winged things have been showing up AGAIN and no matter how I try to ignore it, there it is. I had wondered what more could happen given the fire and all, and I was only being silly because how can numbers and winged things hurt you? Now this. It may be nothing serious but my brain always takes me to the deepest darkest place first and I have to scratch and claw my way back to the light. Right now all I can do is pray.
Then, as we were leaving the house this morning, a truck came barrelling down the street and the dogs shot across the lawn to chase it to the edge of the property. It wasn't dangerous since the dogs were and remained in the yard, behind a fence and not in the road. I had never seen them do that before and I swear I saw a small white dog head bobbing along beside them.
Little dog Olli (remember him) loved to chase any and everything that way. He put his heart and soul into it and ran for all he was worth his little head bobbing along as if to say.. I know I can... I know I can. My heart twisted as it always does when I think of my Ollie. I was always amazed at how much love such a little body could hold.
Casey has the heart of an Ollie. He's the softest touch I know. For instance..... When he was buying a house, he wanted one big enough so that he would have a spare room in case one of his friends needed a place to crash till they got back on their feet. When he lived at home, he was always bringing home stray people who shared his tiny personal space. Now, he stops whenever he sees a motorist in distress to see what he can do. Once, when we were on vacation and he was nearly grown, I noticed he was no longer with his father and I and his girlfriend. When I looked back Casey was standing stock still in the middle of the Boardwalk watching someone. It seems that he had seen a couple quarreling and didn't like the way it was going. When the guy suddenly grabbed the girl by the arm and started dragging her down a ramp and onto a street, Casey was on the move following. The girl swore she was ok, that it was only an argument but I wonder how many people would have done what Casey did... other than his father that is, who followed Casey when I told Michael what was going on.
My earliest memory of Casey's generosity is when he was in early elementary school. I bought them those fancy pencils that, at the time, could only be gotten at school supply stores ( no dolalr stores then) and cost a fair bit. Every day Casey took a new one till I finally out a stop to it and told him he could have only one new one each week and if he lost it then he would take a regular ordinary pencil. That same day he comes home AGAin without his fancy pencil and just as I was about to blow up at him he told me the reason he didn't have the pencil. There was a boy in his class who couldn't behave if his life depended on it and that day this boy had behaved, mostly, so Casey thought he deserved a prize and there went the pencil.
Casey is not perfect. No one is and he and I have had our ups and downs. Lately it's been mostly downs and while those downs hurt my heart I know how good he fundamentally is and how he wants to be loved and how much I do love him.
So now I can only hope and pray that he is ok and I can give him a big fat kiss and he can pat me on the head and call me his "Little Mommy."
Get well Casey.
Double digits and winged things have been showing up AGAIN and no matter how I try to ignore it, there it is. I had wondered what more could happen given the fire and all, and I was only being silly because how can numbers and winged things hurt you? Now this. It may be nothing serious but my brain always takes me to the deepest darkest place first and I have to scratch and claw my way back to the light. Right now all I can do is pray.
Then, as we were leaving the house this morning, a truck came barrelling down the street and the dogs shot across the lawn to chase it to the edge of the property. It wasn't dangerous since the dogs were and remained in the yard, behind a fence and not in the road. I had never seen them do that before and I swear I saw a small white dog head bobbing along beside them.
Little dog Olli (remember him) loved to chase any and everything that way. He put his heart and soul into it and ran for all he was worth his little head bobbing along as if to say.. I know I can... I know I can. My heart twisted as it always does when I think of my Ollie. I was always amazed at how much love such a little body could hold.
Casey has the heart of an Ollie. He's the softest touch I know. For instance..... When he was buying a house, he wanted one big enough so that he would have a spare room in case one of his friends needed a place to crash till they got back on their feet. When he lived at home, he was always bringing home stray people who shared his tiny personal space. Now, he stops whenever he sees a motorist in distress to see what he can do. Once, when we were on vacation and he was nearly grown, I noticed he was no longer with his father and I and his girlfriend. When I looked back Casey was standing stock still in the middle of the Boardwalk watching someone. It seems that he had seen a couple quarreling and didn't like the way it was going. When the guy suddenly grabbed the girl by the arm and started dragging her down a ramp and onto a street, Casey was on the move following. The girl swore she was ok, that it was only an argument but I wonder how many people would have done what Casey did... other than his father that is, who followed Casey when I told Michael what was going on.
My earliest memory of Casey's generosity is when he was in early elementary school. I bought them those fancy pencils that, at the time, could only be gotten at school supply stores ( no dolalr stores then) and cost a fair bit. Every day Casey took a new one till I finally out a stop to it and told him he could have only one new one each week and if he lost it then he would take a regular ordinary pencil. That same day he comes home AGAin without his fancy pencil and just as I was about to blow up at him he told me the reason he didn't have the pencil. There was a boy in his class who couldn't behave if his life depended on it and that day this boy had behaved, mostly, so Casey thought he deserved a prize and there went the pencil.
Casey is not perfect. No one is and he and I have had our ups and downs. Lately it's been mostly downs and while those downs hurt my heart I know how good he fundamentally is and how he wants to be loved and how much I do love him.
So now I can only hope and pray that he is ok and I can give him a big fat kiss and he can pat me on the head and call me his "Little Mommy."
Get well Casey.
Thursday, September 6, 2012
Oddz Bodkinzville
WE ARE HOME!!!!!
My home. My home with the too small house on the big (for this area at least) plot of land. Of course, most of the land now looks like a jungle because the yard hasn't been mowed since last year. However, the dogs are in heaven spending hours roaming the yard, familiarizing themselves with the land that they had been away from for so long. There is also a pile of dirt in the driveway waiting for landscapers to come and spread about and slope to draw rain water away from the house. The dogs, however, think that the pile of dirt is just for them. Already someone is digging him or herself a cave in the side and they spend a great deal of time running up and down the pile and getting their feet all muddy.
And then the two of them go and sit on the front porch, something I swear they never knew existed till we moved back, catch their breath and set off on another adventure.
We now have a usable front door with a window the length of the door which the dogs think is just the best and most times they go out one door to then come in a different door AND their doggy door hasn't been installed yet and when it is, I swear those dogs will be in and out a hundred times a day. Kali hasn't stopped grinning and Charlie will sit for hours on the porch simply because he can.
I LOVE MY HOUSE!! I love my house. I love the colors the floors the cabinets the new french doors and the promise of a deck. I love the extra bathroom and the space Josh has in his two rooms in the basement. Two rooms painted bright and light and a far cry from the cave like basement he had been living in. All of that dark paneling is gone, thank god and everything is lighter.
Josh had friends over and one guy, our usual Wednesday night visitor when we were in the rental, asked for a tour and then stood in the living room and asked me why did people just paint their interiors white or off white when they could put such COLOR into their life. Ok, I like the colors even though it reminds me of a pinata but who would think a young man would appreciate it so. Then the rest of the friends chimed in later as to how great the house looked and was I happy and how glad they were for us. I'm glad for me too!
We like the extra long windows that the county demanded be put into the bedrooms so we can get out in case of a ....shhh...f.i.r.e. I like the soap dispenser that is part of the kitchen sink, the small breakfast bar and the hanging lamps (to come) that was the idea of the builder and a surprise for me. I liek the space and I SWEAR I am not stuffing the house full of furniture and STUFF. My craft room is a little crowded now but once I get in my storage from Ikea All that boxed stuff will be sorted and stored.
I actually have sheets etc that match. My bedroom furniture is going to be light wood and not that dreadful dark that we had. I'b be happy with a white chest and night stand and i already have a white bookcase that I put together (tho not too well) last night. NO shades or curtains yet but shades are a priority and curtains will come when I find the perfect ones.
I have a new camera but I want stuff in a settled before I start taking pics and posting them.
Now I just have to finish emptying the rental house, then call the disaster services guys to come and take the furniture back, then hire a cleaning service to clean and mop which should be easy for them in an empty house. Serv Pro still has what they were able to save and on top of all of this the husband wants to go on VACATION for a week to the beach leaving the 15th. Which means staying ina HOTEL something I promised myself I wouldn't do again, not after 31 days in one when this all began.
I know it will all be done, eventually but I do wish there were elves or magic folk or someone I could hire to come and empty the rest of our stuff out of the rental so I wouldn't have to go back there ever again with the stepford neighbors. I think however, the only magic folk will end up being me with my banker boxes. oh well. This too will pass.
My home. My home with the too small house on the big (for this area at least) plot of land. Of course, most of the land now looks like a jungle because the yard hasn't been mowed since last year. However, the dogs are in heaven spending hours roaming the yard, familiarizing themselves with the land that they had been away from for so long. There is also a pile of dirt in the driveway waiting for landscapers to come and spread about and slope to draw rain water away from the house. The dogs, however, think that the pile of dirt is just for them. Already someone is digging him or herself a cave in the side and they spend a great deal of time running up and down the pile and getting their feet all muddy.
And then the two of them go and sit on the front porch, something I swear they never knew existed till we moved back, catch their breath and set off on another adventure.
We now have a usable front door with a window the length of the door which the dogs think is just the best and most times they go out one door to then come in a different door AND their doggy door hasn't been installed yet and when it is, I swear those dogs will be in and out a hundred times a day. Kali hasn't stopped grinning and Charlie will sit for hours on the porch simply because he can.
I LOVE MY HOUSE!! I love my house. I love the colors the floors the cabinets the new french doors and the promise of a deck. I love the extra bathroom and the space Josh has in his two rooms in the basement. Two rooms painted bright and light and a far cry from the cave like basement he had been living in. All of that dark paneling is gone, thank god and everything is lighter.
Josh had friends over and one guy, our usual Wednesday night visitor when we were in the rental, asked for a tour and then stood in the living room and asked me why did people just paint their interiors white or off white when they could put such COLOR into their life. Ok, I like the colors even though it reminds me of a pinata but who would think a young man would appreciate it so. Then the rest of the friends chimed in later as to how great the house looked and was I happy and how glad they were for us. I'm glad for me too!
We like the extra long windows that the county demanded be put into the bedrooms so we can get out in case of a ....shhh...f.i.r.e. I like the soap dispenser that is part of the kitchen sink, the small breakfast bar and the hanging lamps (to come) that was the idea of the builder and a surprise for me. I liek the space and I SWEAR I am not stuffing the house full of furniture and STUFF. My craft room is a little crowded now but once I get in my storage from Ikea All that boxed stuff will be sorted and stored.
I actually have sheets etc that match. My bedroom furniture is going to be light wood and not that dreadful dark that we had. I'b be happy with a white chest and night stand and i already have a white bookcase that I put together (tho not too well) last night. NO shades or curtains yet but shades are a priority and curtains will come when I find the perfect ones.
I have a new camera but I want stuff in a settled before I start taking pics and posting them.
Now I just have to finish emptying the rental house, then call the disaster services guys to come and take the furniture back, then hire a cleaning service to clean and mop which should be easy for them in an empty house. Serv Pro still has what they were able to save and on top of all of this the husband wants to go on VACATION for a week to the beach leaving the 15th. Which means staying ina HOTEL something I promised myself I wouldn't do again, not after 31 days in one when this all began.
I know it will all be done, eventually but I do wish there were elves or magic folk or someone I could hire to come and empty the rest of our stuff out of the rental so I wouldn't have to go back there ever again with the stepford neighbors. I think however, the only magic folk will end up being me with my banker boxes. oh well. This too will pass.
Wednesday, August 15, 2012
Limping along
This return to the house is taking absolutely forever. All I want is to get home. The last time we were in the house we discovered that all of the rooms are painted, inside doors are hung, cabinets were delivered but still in their boxes. Bathtubs are in and all the windows and we have a new furnace and a sump pump to keep the basement from flooding
The kitchen is a very bright yellow. I wanted a shade lighter but the husband wanted the brighter one. So brighter we went and it is bright. The living room is peach... not orange I learned my lesson in the rental house's craft room and its pumpkin color. We have a brown sofa and recliner on lay away which will go very nicely with peach walls.
'
My craft room is the absolute perfect blue. A strong mediterrean blue that is the shade I wanted..exactly. My bedroom (the husband and I both snore and if we want to sleep we sleep in separate rooms) is the perfect moss green and the husband's bedroom is a watermelon kind of pink/red. I don't like it, but he does. The basement room are an off white while the bathrooms are a bright white and tile.
We had the dogs with us when we went through the house. They thought it was some kind of playground and went about on their own. We walk into my bedroom and there is Charlie making a poop. In the middle of my bedroom floor (rough flooring the good stuff wasn't down yet.). I guess Charlie was making his mark And Charlie who was so hesitant of steps that he had NEVER been in the basement of the house before the fire was now up and down those steps like he had been born to it. Surprisingly, Kali hesitated doing the steps and only with encouragement from Charlie did she join us in the basement.
THis time last year Chrlie was just recovering from a gastrointestinal infection so virulent that it nearly killed him. He was down to a pitiful 9 pounds, literally skin and bones and he should have been dead. But he didn't die and one day while Josh was frying eggs for himself, the on death's door puppy wobbled his way to him and Josh started feeding him eggs. Charlie greeted us at the door that day that dissolved me into tears. You would never know that Charlie was so sick if you see him today. He's tall and glassy and full of energy.He still takes my arm when he wants to take me someplace and I'm certain a good hard bite from him could break my arm but I know he would never break my arm or bite. He's just a big old cuddly thing that gets so excited each time I come home you would think I had been gone for years. He and Kali have been so good throughout this whole mess tho they are now frightened of fire trucks and any siren makes them freeze in place while they listen. At home, they can really stretch their legs and run, like deer and bark at birds, bees, clouds and anything else they want to bark at without me having to tell them they have to be quiet.
We've said nothing to the rental house neighbors as to when we will be moving. We've been getting the cold shoulder from them so there is no need for goodbyes.
I can't get home fast enough.
I wonder if I keep my eyes crossed till then that it will work magic and we WILL be in the house on the 25th.
The kitchen is a very bright yellow. I wanted a shade lighter but the husband wanted the brighter one. So brighter we went and it is bright. The living room is peach... not orange I learned my lesson in the rental house's craft room and its pumpkin color. We have a brown sofa and recliner on lay away which will go very nicely with peach walls.
'
My craft room is the absolute perfect blue. A strong mediterrean blue that is the shade I wanted..exactly. My bedroom (the husband and I both snore and if we want to sleep we sleep in separate rooms) is the perfect moss green and the husband's bedroom is a watermelon kind of pink/red. I don't like it, but he does. The basement room are an off white while the bathrooms are a bright white and tile.
We had the dogs with us when we went through the house. They thought it was some kind of playground and went about on their own. We walk into my bedroom and there is Charlie making a poop. In the middle of my bedroom floor (rough flooring the good stuff wasn't down yet.). I guess Charlie was making his mark And Charlie who was so hesitant of steps that he had NEVER been in the basement of the house before the fire was now up and down those steps like he had been born to it. Surprisingly, Kali hesitated doing the steps and only with encouragement from Charlie did she join us in the basement.
THis time last year Chrlie was just recovering from a gastrointestinal infection so virulent that it nearly killed him. He was down to a pitiful 9 pounds, literally skin and bones and he should have been dead. But he didn't die and one day while Josh was frying eggs for himself, the on death's door puppy wobbled his way to him and Josh started feeding him eggs. Charlie greeted us at the door that day that dissolved me into tears. You would never know that Charlie was so sick if you see him today. He's tall and glassy and full of energy.He still takes my arm when he wants to take me someplace and I'm certain a good hard bite from him could break my arm but I know he would never break my arm or bite. He's just a big old cuddly thing that gets so excited each time I come home you would think I had been gone for years. He and Kali have been so good throughout this whole mess tho they are now frightened of fire trucks and any siren makes them freeze in place while they listen. At home, they can really stretch their legs and run, like deer and bark at birds, bees, clouds and anything else they want to bark at without me having to tell them they have to be quiet.
We've said nothing to the rental house neighbors as to when we will be moving. We've been getting the cold shoulder from them so there is no need for goodbyes.
I can't get home fast enough.
I wonder if I keep my eyes crossed till then that it will work magic and we WILL be in the house on the 25th.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Broke m y heart
I think I've mentioned before that the body of a local woman missing for 20+ years was found under the she din her back yard. I knew this woman. Volunteered at school with her, her older son in class with Josh.
I read a follow up today that the defense attorney for her husband wants to re autopsy the bones only he can't because they have been cremated. It had something to do with the coroner and that her sons had handled the bones.
OH MY LIVING GOD. I have this dreadful thought in my head of the sons, crouched beside the exhumation hole holding onto their mother's bones as if they were finally getting to hug her close. Her sons are men now but I see them in my head as 10 and 7 as they were when she tucked them into bed that night and kissed them goodnight only she didn't know she was giving them her last kiss.
This whole thing breaks my heart. I can't even dredge up a roaring anger against the bastard that killed her and burried her in the back yard of the house where he raised those boys!!!! All i can feel is the sorrow of the boys, the heartbreak and the loss of their mommy.
I think of all she missed out on, too. Watching those boys grow. Watching them grow from children to men. Watching them find their way, fall in love, laugh, cry, sigh. Snatching a hug from them, reveling in her pride in them. Touching their faces, smoothing their hair, just loving them every minute of every day.
I suppose the boys holding her bones were loving her as well. Did their tears fall onto the bones? We they reluctant to give them up? Did they remember their mother as they last saw her? Did they pray for her? Have they forgiven their father.
Those poor boys, that poor woman. The horrible situation.
I read a follow up today that the defense attorney for her husband wants to re autopsy the bones only he can't because they have been cremated. It had something to do with the coroner and that her sons had handled the bones.
OH MY LIVING GOD. I have this dreadful thought in my head of the sons, crouched beside the exhumation hole holding onto their mother's bones as if they were finally getting to hug her close. Her sons are men now but I see them in my head as 10 and 7 as they were when she tucked them into bed that night and kissed them goodnight only she didn't know she was giving them her last kiss.
This whole thing breaks my heart. I can't even dredge up a roaring anger against the bastard that killed her and burried her in the back yard of the house where he raised those boys!!!! All i can feel is the sorrow of the boys, the heartbreak and the loss of their mommy.
I think of all she missed out on, too. Watching those boys grow. Watching them grow from children to men. Watching them find their way, fall in love, laugh, cry, sigh. Snatching a hug from them, reveling in her pride in them. Touching their faces, smoothing their hair, just loving them every minute of every day.
I suppose the boys holding her bones were loving her as well. Did their tears fall onto the bones? We they reluctant to give them up? Did they remember their mother as they last saw her? Did they pray for her? Have they forgiven their father.
Those poor boys, that poor woman. The horrible situation.
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Mary the Hairdresser's Sister Berniece
When the sons were small thay absolutely HATED having their hair washed. I tried everything to make it less of a battle between us. We bought some halo looking rubber thing to encircle their head and keep the water out of their faces. Then there was the spray hose doo dad that looked like a dinosaur. Then I tried to wash their hair while they were sitting up in the tub, laying down with thier head toward the drain, upside down dipping their head into the water as if they were a chip I was dipping. I didn't really do the last one but mostly because I didn't think about it till now.
In stepped Mary the Hairdresser's sister Berniece.
Mary the Hairdresser is a real person. In fact, she was the hairdresser for one of my Aunts. I suppose she had a real last name but she was always known as Mary the Hairdresser. She was as much a part of our extended family as anyone else and she even came to my Aunt's funeral. I have no idea if she had a sister so I gave her one.
Mary the Hairdresser's Sister Berniece sprang into life as a hairdresser herself. The sons would have "appointments" with her and while she washed their hair she talked to them in a Balmer accent rich with Hon's and Stoshes and Mune-i-sip-all buildings and 'gone down the ocean, hon'.
While Berniece chatted away with her stories the boys would become so engrossed in the story that their hair got washed without tears or fussing. Thanks to Mary the Hairdresser's Sister Berneice who just happened to look just like ME!!! What a co-incidence.
And just the other day, when I was ripping apart magazines for my gluw books, I can across a sentence that I just had to have. It read Berneice is not a Hon. Huh?? What??? Holy moley. So maybe Berneice is real.
Who knew? I didn't.
In stepped Mary the Hairdresser's sister Berniece.
Mary the Hairdresser is a real person. In fact, she was the hairdresser for one of my Aunts. I suppose she had a real last name but she was always known as Mary the Hairdresser. She was as much a part of our extended family as anyone else and she even came to my Aunt's funeral. I have no idea if she had a sister so I gave her one.
Mary the Hairdresser's Sister Berniece sprang into life as a hairdresser herself. The sons would have "appointments" with her and while she washed their hair she talked to them in a Balmer accent rich with Hon's and Stoshes and Mune-i-sip-all buildings and 'gone down the ocean, hon'.
While Berniece chatted away with her stories the boys would become so engrossed in the story that their hair got washed without tears or fussing. Thanks to Mary the Hairdresser's Sister Berneice who just happened to look just like ME!!! What a co-incidence.
And just the other day, when I was ripping apart magazines for my gluw books, I can across a sentence that I just had to have. It read Berneice is not a Hon. Huh?? What??? Holy moley. So maybe Berneice is real.
Who knew? I didn't.
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
The Stepford Neighborz
The neighborz at the rental are at it again. Michael skipped a week mowing that postage sized lawn and a complaint was made to the owner of the house. Oh for goodness sakes. Get over it already.
This time an inspection is in the works, which means inside as well as out. Oddly, for me, all I had to do inside was mop the kitchen floor and round up the Charlie tumbleweed of hair that has been growing in size behind the bedroom door. I was leaving it to see just how big it would get. you know the tumbleweed hairball that swallowed the world kind of thing. Maybe I'll just tuck tumbleweed hairball away until AFTER the inspection and it can then go its merry old way sucking up solar systems and anything else that gets too close.
Anyway back to the inspection.
I suck at house work but have been making a concentrated effort not to Graff up this place and suddenly, obviously, I see I'm not doing such a bad job of it. I guess if you don't have a lot of stuff it's much easier to keep the stuff in its place. So I mopped the floor using just vinegar and water and even wiped down the windows to remove dog nose prints. The irony of all of this is that (fingers crossed) we should be out of this place in a month and I am so tempted to save up the dog poo till then and then creep back one night once we are gone and decorate the stepford neighborz lawns with it. I won't do it. who wants to get up in the middle of the night anyway, but it is something to think about. And cackle maniacally.
I certainly couldn't live that way, everything so neat and clean and precise. I mean who goes out and buys pillow just to put them on the chairs on the front porch and the back deck? It makes my head hurt just to think about it.
I will now admit that I was WAAAAAYYYYY too messy back at home but the fire has cured me for that. It'll be rough at first remembering where I put things but we'll get the hang of it. Now they just have to finish the rebuild and we can move. Thank goodness.
This time an inspection is in the works, which means inside as well as out. Oddly, for me, all I had to do inside was mop the kitchen floor and round up the Charlie tumbleweed of hair that has been growing in size behind the bedroom door. I was leaving it to see just how big it would get. you know the tumbleweed hairball that swallowed the world kind of thing. Maybe I'll just tuck tumbleweed hairball away until AFTER the inspection and it can then go its merry old way sucking up solar systems and anything else that gets too close.
Anyway back to the inspection.
I suck at house work but have been making a concentrated effort not to Graff up this place and suddenly, obviously, I see I'm not doing such a bad job of it. I guess if you don't have a lot of stuff it's much easier to keep the stuff in its place. So I mopped the floor using just vinegar and water and even wiped down the windows to remove dog nose prints. The irony of all of this is that (fingers crossed) we should be out of this place in a month and I am so tempted to save up the dog poo till then and then creep back one night once we are gone and decorate the stepford neighborz lawns with it. I won't do it. who wants to get up in the middle of the night anyway, but it is something to think about. And cackle maniacally.
I certainly couldn't live that way, everything so neat and clean and precise. I mean who goes out and buys pillow just to put them on the chairs on the front porch and the back deck? It makes my head hurt just to think about it.
I will now admit that I was WAAAAAYYYYY too messy back at home but the fire has cured me for that. It'll be rough at first remembering where I put things but we'll get the hang of it. Now they just have to finish the rebuild and we can move. Thank goodness.
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
It just keepz dragging on
I swear, this getting back into the house seems to be taking forever even tho it isn't, not really. I guess I'm just too anxious to wait any longer. We have power back, that's a plus but paint takes forever to dry when it's humid and when is it NOT humid in Maryland in the summer?
The grass in the yard gets higher and higher and the dogs are becoming more and more restless. I really have to give the two of them credit. They aren't used to not being able to just run and running up and down the steps just isn't enough. So we take them back to the house so they can run the yard and then visit the neighbors. The other night when I was picking up Josh from work, I took the dogz with me. They were so excited when I invited them, I swear they were vibrating. And even tho it was one mommy and two of them they were so good. I let them run a bit when we picked up Josh but they were happy to go back to the rental and went into the yard without hesitation. I guess it doesn't matter with dogz where they are as long as they are with their people.
Now they haven't been perfect. Who would want a perfect dog? They did shred 7 toiletpaper rolls that were sitting on the floor in the dining room because we all hate going into the back of the cellar. & rolls spread from one end of the first floor to the other. A charmin sort of snow storm. We didn't really yell at them, just told them they shouldn't have done it and they responded with the folded back ears and the big sorrowful eyes. I have found that I do not need to yell at my dogs. The worst scolding for them is fore me to tell them I don't like them right now and then I ignore them. Not for long, how could I ignore them for long, and when I tell them they are forgiven they nearly jump out of their skin with joy.
Kali has taken to given me kisses. Charlie's kissed me from the first day we brought him home but not Kali. She does like her smooched which means I cradle her close and smooch all over her face. Just recently and I do mean recently like last saturday, she gave me a kiss and then tried to mimic Charlie's hugs. A Charlie Hug is a daunting prospect, best accepted without glasses unless you don't mind them mashed into you face. A Charlie hug is basicly when Charlie pushes you over and then rolls all over you, using his silly little girl bark the whole while. Now Kali is doing it, tho she is a bit more delicate than the bruzer boy. Meanwhile Charlie is still shedding and after a number of hugs I am about ready to cough up a hair ball. How can that dog shed so much and not be bald?
There have been sightings of what the neighbors think is Isabella but I haven't seen her. My poor timid little girl. Where my other cat Chloe could handle outside well, Bella never could and rarely went out. I hate thinking of her running wild and only can hope someone is seeing to her.
I finally put in an order to replace my powdered pigments and cannot wait till they come in. I didn't order as much as I lost but probably will eventually.
Other than that... nothing is new and so that's it for this installment of as the head whirlz.
The grass in the yard gets higher and higher and the dogs are becoming more and more restless. I really have to give the two of them credit. They aren't used to not being able to just run and running up and down the steps just isn't enough. So we take them back to the house so they can run the yard and then visit the neighbors. The other night when I was picking up Josh from work, I took the dogz with me. They were so excited when I invited them, I swear they were vibrating. And even tho it was one mommy and two of them they were so good. I let them run a bit when we picked up Josh but they were happy to go back to the rental and went into the yard without hesitation. I guess it doesn't matter with dogz where they are as long as they are with their people.
Now they haven't been perfect. Who would want a perfect dog? They did shred 7 toiletpaper rolls that were sitting on the floor in the dining room because we all hate going into the back of the cellar. & rolls spread from one end of the first floor to the other. A charmin sort of snow storm. We didn't really yell at them, just told them they shouldn't have done it and they responded with the folded back ears and the big sorrowful eyes. I have found that I do not need to yell at my dogs. The worst scolding for them is fore me to tell them I don't like them right now and then I ignore them. Not for long, how could I ignore them for long, and when I tell them they are forgiven they nearly jump out of their skin with joy.
Kali has taken to given me kisses. Charlie's kissed me from the first day we brought him home but not Kali. She does like her smooched which means I cradle her close and smooch all over her face. Just recently and I do mean recently like last saturday, she gave me a kiss and then tried to mimic Charlie's hugs. A Charlie Hug is a daunting prospect, best accepted without glasses unless you don't mind them mashed into you face. A Charlie hug is basicly when Charlie pushes you over and then rolls all over you, using his silly little girl bark the whole while. Now Kali is doing it, tho she is a bit more delicate than the bruzer boy. Meanwhile Charlie is still shedding and after a number of hugs I am about ready to cough up a hair ball. How can that dog shed so much and not be bald?
There have been sightings of what the neighbors think is Isabella but I haven't seen her. My poor timid little girl. Where my other cat Chloe could handle outside well, Bella never could and rarely went out. I hate thinking of her running wild and only can hope someone is seeing to her.
I finally put in an order to replace my powdered pigments and cannot wait till they come in. I didn't order as much as I lost but probably will eventually.
Other than that... nothing is new and so that's it for this installment of as the head whirlz.
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
In the merry old land of Oddz---NOT
I am a mess today. So much crap happened yesterday that I don't know how much more I can take before committal is needed.
The worst is that we are going to be investigated by the Justice Department. We obey the law, do everything we can for our clients, go above and beyond but still.. it's terrifying.
I have a mind that runs away with me at the smallest provocation and so this has my brain in a stranglehold.
Then we learned that while we thought we would get the whole amount of our fire claim in one check, we now find out that we have to buy the items we lost whether we want them or not. Now since we were planning on using contents for upgrades about the house and the new roof is already on, I have no idea how we are going to pay for it all.
Now this morning my brain did not have enough fun keeping me tossing and turning all night and giving me the headache from hell but now I thought what if the justice department throws us in jail. I think I have to give in and call my doctor for something to boost my prozac and keep me as close to sane as I can get.
I hate being like this. I hate being a burden. I hate being terrified out of my mind.... I hate... I hate.... I hate.....
Sorry but since I cannot maintain anin person friendship I have no one else to talk to. Thanks for listening.
The worst is that we are going to be investigated by the Justice Department. We obey the law, do everything we can for our clients, go above and beyond but still.. it's terrifying.
I have a mind that runs away with me at the smallest provocation and so this has my brain in a stranglehold.
Then we learned that while we thought we would get the whole amount of our fire claim in one check, we now find out that we have to buy the items we lost whether we want them or not. Now since we were planning on using contents for upgrades about the house and the new roof is already on, I have no idea how we are going to pay for it all.
Now this morning my brain did not have enough fun keeping me tossing and turning all night and giving me the headache from hell but now I thought what if the justice department throws us in jail. I think I have to give in and call my doctor for something to boost my prozac and keep me as close to sane as I can get.
I hate being like this. I hate being a burden. I hate being terrified out of my mind.... I hate... I hate.... I hate.....
Sorry but since I cannot maintain anin person friendship I have no one else to talk to. Thanks for listening.
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Waiting for newz
The Independant Insurance Adjusters are meeting with our insurance company today and, fingerz crozzed, we will learn later when we are getting our contents money and how much.
Which brings me to a case of Knotted Ztomach. I can make due with whatever money we are given but what has me frankly scared is telling second son that he may not be getting the $33,000.00 he thought he was getting. This is the son than gave us so much trouble fire night. The one who had referred to me, to his firends, as That Bitch and Her House. It wouldn't be so bad if the old poop aka- huzband- didn't insist on going on a vacation with replacement money. Youngest son will throw a fit. Not that I blame him, but I will be taking the fall out because I am that Bitch with Her House. I also need teeth desperately, I have a hag's mouth, and was hoping that I could get dentures. How we are going to do all of that I do not know.
Now older son, when we hand him his share will look at it and tell me he doesn't need it. As if he doesn't need a bed etc. The old poop tells me not to worry but that is easy to say. He claims that he doesn't worry about anything and he's right. What he doesn't know is that he doesn't worry because it all falls back to me. I have to be the one that knows what to do in an emergency, how much food we have in the house, and how are we going to pay what bill when. It's even my responsibility to let him know where he's going and if he's going in the right direction.
I have not bought any furniture since about 20 years ago so I have no idea how to even go about it. Aarrghhh. Not to mention all the other stuff I need to get as if I was just getting married and had to set up home. Hey I have my craft stuff and my table for the craft room, do I really have to bother with the rest of the house?
So, that's my quandry for today. Seems I have one a day. Maybe I should turn them into a calendar so I could have the pleasure of ripping off and crumpling up my quandry day by day.
Nah... too much work.
Speaking or work.... bye.
Which brings me to a case of Knotted Ztomach. I can make due with whatever money we are given but what has me frankly scared is telling second son that he may not be getting the $33,000.00 he thought he was getting. This is the son than gave us so much trouble fire night. The one who had referred to me, to his firends, as That Bitch and Her House. It wouldn't be so bad if the old poop aka- huzband- didn't insist on going on a vacation with replacement money. Youngest son will throw a fit. Not that I blame him, but I will be taking the fall out because I am that Bitch with Her House. I also need teeth desperately, I have a hag's mouth, and was hoping that I could get dentures. How we are going to do all of that I do not know.
Now older son, when we hand him his share will look at it and tell me he doesn't need it. As if he doesn't need a bed etc. The old poop tells me not to worry but that is easy to say. He claims that he doesn't worry about anything and he's right. What he doesn't know is that he doesn't worry because it all falls back to me. I have to be the one that knows what to do in an emergency, how much food we have in the house, and how are we going to pay what bill when. It's even my responsibility to let him know where he's going and if he's going in the right direction.
I have not bought any furniture since about 20 years ago so I have no idea how to even go about it. Aarrghhh. Not to mention all the other stuff I need to get as if I was just getting married and had to set up home. Hey I have my craft stuff and my table for the craft room, do I really have to bother with the rest of the house?
So, that's my quandry for today. Seems I have one a day. Maybe I should turn them into a calendar so I could have the pleasure of ripping off and crumpling up my quandry day by day.
Nah... too much work.
Speaking or work.... bye.
Monday, July 9, 2012
In the steany land of Oddz
Last week we had a hellacious heat wave right in the middle of a power outage that lasted for days.
At home... my real one... we would lose power if someone sneezed except this time, Elkridge ha the power and the rental neighborhood didn't. No power, no ice, no nothing but enough sweat to fill an ocean. When we did get out the world smelled of sweat and feet and food rapidly rotting in fridges and freezers.
I really didn't mind the heat as much as I minded the fact that I had to go to bed when the sun went down which meant I was up at the butt crack of dawn still steaming.
These new neighborz, the stepford people, grumbled and mumbled and whined. You would have thought that the power company chose them deliberately and not that 600,000 people were out of power. Carmella Drive became Piss and Moan drive. And guess what world.... pissing and moaning do not do a thing toward getting power back on. And when the power guys and the visiting guys from out of state finally got our power back, did the piss and moan neighborz than the guyz? No, they all ran into their house to turn the AC back on. I trudged up the hill, found a clump of power guys and told them I had one thing to say to them and that is... by this time their heads had somewhat turtled into their shoulders waiting for someone else to yell at them. Only I said that I wanted to thank them all for their effort and I wished I could give them all a glass of cold water only I had no ice. Nor could you find ice. Power guys unturtled, grinned and told me I made their day. Then I went into the house and turned on my air conditioner.
With the heat we told the contractor that we didn't expect him to have his guys work when it was so deadly hot. Apparently his customers usually don't do that. and expect the work to continue come hell or high water. The heat supplied the hell, the sweat the high water. Even with that, we have WALLS!!!! And I have my garden window and suddenly the house that seemed so small without walls doesn't seems quite as small. It is a small house but it is my home and even with the trees and the semi cloudy sky the house was still bright inside. Yah... no paneling... sunlight instead. Now we just need the money so we can buy furniture. I really cannot wait to go home. My home.
When we were looking to buy a house and get out of the town house 30 years ago, we pulled into the drive way of waht was to become our home and before we even got out of the real estate guy's car the Old Poop and I looked at each other and said that we were HOME. There was always a sense of the place wrapping its arms around you. As we walked through the house today I I went in each room, greeted it and told it that I was sorry as to what had happened. the house has felt so sad but I swear it perked up a bit.
We had angels in the house, have I told you? There was a corner in the living room where I had displayed a shrine I had made to our guardian angels in a cigar box ans whenever anyone took a photo in the house, orbs appeared but only in that corner, no where else. The shrine was sacrificed to the fire damage but I will be making a new one to invite the angels back. And yes, the are angel orbs and not ghost orbs or spirit orbs. They feel like angels. Angels that saved us all even if we did lose so much.
Is it any wonder I want to crawl back into those comforting home arms? Time has dragged since February 17th and at times I wonder if we will ever get to the day when our home is our home again.
MAybe then my sense of humor will come back. I hope so.
At home... my real one... we would lose power if someone sneezed except this time, Elkridge ha the power and the rental neighborhood didn't. No power, no ice, no nothing but enough sweat to fill an ocean. When we did get out the world smelled of sweat and feet and food rapidly rotting in fridges and freezers.
I really didn't mind the heat as much as I minded the fact that I had to go to bed when the sun went down which meant I was up at the butt crack of dawn still steaming.
These new neighborz, the stepford people, grumbled and mumbled and whined. You would have thought that the power company chose them deliberately and not that 600,000 people were out of power. Carmella Drive became Piss and Moan drive. And guess what world.... pissing and moaning do not do a thing toward getting power back on. And when the power guys and the visiting guys from out of state finally got our power back, did the piss and moan neighborz than the guyz? No, they all ran into their house to turn the AC back on. I trudged up the hill, found a clump of power guys and told them I had one thing to say to them and that is... by this time their heads had somewhat turtled into their shoulders waiting for someone else to yell at them. Only I said that I wanted to thank them all for their effort and I wished I could give them all a glass of cold water only I had no ice. Nor could you find ice. Power guys unturtled, grinned and told me I made their day. Then I went into the house and turned on my air conditioner.
With the heat we told the contractor that we didn't expect him to have his guys work when it was so deadly hot. Apparently his customers usually don't do that. and expect the work to continue come hell or high water. The heat supplied the hell, the sweat the high water. Even with that, we have WALLS!!!! And I have my garden window and suddenly the house that seemed so small without walls doesn't seems quite as small. It is a small house but it is my home and even with the trees and the semi cloudy sky the house was still bright inside. Yah... no paneling... sunlight instead. Now we just need the money so we can buy furniture. I really cannot wait to go home. My home.
When we were looking to buy a house and get out of the town house 30 years ago, we pulled into the drive way of waht was to become our home and before we even got out of the real estate guy's car the Old Poop and I looked at each other and said that we were HOME. There was always a sense of the place wrapping its arms around you. As we walked through the house today I I went in each room, greeted it and told it that I was sorry as to what had happened. the house has felt so sad but I swear it perked up a bit.
We had angels in the house, have I told you? There was a corner in the living room where I had displayed a shrine I had made to our guardian angels in a cigar box ans whenever anyone took a photo in the house, orbs appeared but only in that corner, no where else. The shrine was sacrificed to the fire damage but I will be making a new one to invite the angels back. And yes, the are angel orbs and not ghost orbs or spirit orbs. They feel like angels. Angels that saved us all even if we did lose so much.
Is it any wonder I want to crawl back into those comforting home arms? Time has dragged since February 17th and at times I wonder if we will ever get to the day when our home is our home again.
MAybe then my sense of humor will come back. I hope so.
Monday, July 2, 2012
OK so who curled my hair
Woke up this morning, looked in the mirror, not hard to do because one whole wall in the rental house is mirrored closet doors and found my hair a curly tangled mess. It was the same thing yesterday. I guess when it's hot and I dew (real ladies don't sweat, they dew) copiously my hair
curlz itself.
My hair. For years it didn't seem to grow except for the bang. I would trim the bangs but everything else seemed the status quo. It is now growing and I cannot remember a time when I had so much hair, even tho it hardly reaches my shoulders, and I would like to find the person responsible for those hair clip doobie designs and give them a big fat kiss. Of course, in a pinch I've also used binder clips and toothpicks. All of this hair, for me, makes me too hot especially since we have had no power at the rental house since FRIDAY night and have no idea WHEN we will. I keep going to the BGE (the electric guys) site to check outages and in the rental area those outages are increasing while everywhere else it seems to be decreasing. Figurez.
I must admit that I had a good time watching the neighbors after the storm rushing out with their broom to sweep up leaves and such. No trash other than the stuff that falls off trees or blows through in a storm, no garbage, no random house sitting in the middle of the road waiting for Dorothy to show up.
This has got to be the cleanngest neighborhood I've ever seen. There are neighbors who dust their cars. Others sweep gutters and other others crawl around on their tiny front lawn picking up any stray leaf that dares to invade. First thing in the morning, in a sort of rush as if someone was timing them. I wonder what these people would do if there WAS any real honest to goodness garbage. It was 101 degrees and the guy next door was cleaning his windows!! And the guy across the street showed up with his lawn mower only to realize after trying to start it and scowling at the damned machine even kicking it once before realizing that an electric mower was NO GOOD when the power is OUT!! I waited for him to come out with a pair of scissors to cut the lawn by hand. He didn't.
Then I noticed that little american flags have sprouted beside everyone's steps, with no idea how they got there. When I mentioned it to the old Poop telling him that someone had put out flags for the fourth he asked me what country the flags were for. I told him Romania and walked away. I am certain that there a a fourth of July in Romania just like every other country has a JUly fourth only not in conjunction with Independence day. I wasn't being a smart ass to be mean. I was being a smart ass in an attempt to get this man to hear what I say to him and not what he THINKS I'm saying. The mean part is just the icing.
So that's it from this steaming neck of the woods. Stay cool my friends and send some of it this way.
curlz itself.
My hair. For years it didn't seem to grow except for the bang. I would trim the bangs but everything else seemed the status quo. It is now growing and I cannot remember a time when I had so much hair, even tho it hardly reaches my shoulders, and I would like to find the person responsible for those hair clip doobie designs and give them a big fat kiss. Of course, in a pinch I've also used binder clips and toothpicks. All of this hair, for me, makes me too hot especially since we have had no power at the rental house since FRIDAY night and have no idea WHEN we will. I keep going to the BGE (the electric guys) site to check outages and in the rental area those outages are increasing while everywhere else it seems to be decreasing. Figurez.
I must admit that I had a good time watching the neighbors after the storm rushing out with their broom to sweep up leaves and such. No trash other than the stuff that falls off trees or blows through in a storm, no garbage, no random house sitting in the middle of the road waiting for Dorothy to show up.
This has got to be the cleanngest neighborhood I've ever seen. There are neighbors who dust their cars. Others sweep gutters and other others crawl around on their tiny front lawn picking up any stray leaf that dares to invade. First thing in the morning, in a sort of rush as if someone was timing them. I wonder what these people would do if there WAS any real honest to goodness garbage. It was 101 degrees and the guy next door was cleaning his windows!! And the guy across the street showed up with his lawn mower only to realize after trying to start it and scowling at the damned machine even kicking it once before realizing that an electric mower was NO GOOD when the power is OUT!! I waited for him to come out with a pair of scissors to cut the lawn by hand. He didn't.
Then I noticed that little american flags have sprouted beside everyone's steps, with no idea how they got there. When I mentioned it to the old Poop telling him that someone had put out flags for the fourth he asked me what country the flags were for. I told him Romania and walked away. I am certain that there a a fourth of July in Romania just like every other country has a JUly fourth only not in conjunction with Independence day. I wasn't being a smart ass to be mean. I was being a smart ass in an attempt to get this man to hear what I say to him and not what he THINKS I'm saying. The mean part is just the icing.
So that's it from this steaming neck of the woods. Stay cool my friends and send some of it this way.
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Memoriez
Getting old has its perks, I suppose. Senior citizen discount is one but I don't like getting old. I don't like looking at the end of my life that is certainly closer than the beginning of my life. I'm not afraid of dying. It happens to all of us. What I hate is the memoriez that pop up unbidden and remind me of all that is past.
My favorite time of my life was when the boys were small. Too young, yet for school but no longer babies. The days stretched endlessly before them as they shared their childhood with me. There were days in the sun, days inside, days where we danced and sang and acted silly and days when we sat and created something that was our alone.
I loved the way they smelled after a day in the sun. They smelled of little boy sweat, sunshine and whatever was growing in the herb garden where they liked to sit. They would run and play until it grew too warm and then they would come inside for lunch and a rest before settling down with something in the cool of the house.
I miss that. I miss the curve of Casey's very brown cheek and the softness of his very blonde hair. I loved the lankiness of Josh's little boy body and the sound of his laughter. I loved the way they announced to the world that they were brolees, their word for brothers, and heaven help anyone who came between them.
I miss their giggles. Giggles so powerful that sometimes they couldn't run from me because of those giggles. I miss them powdering themselves and the whole living room with cornstarch in what they called "We Powder Weselves". I miss Casey's foot speaking to me and the notes he would slip under the bathroom door announcing that the ahn-du-nope man was delivering the mail. I miss little kid words frotmockl (motor cycle) Floptopker (helicopter) and Rah nah nee (Fire truck... listen to the sound of the siren rah na nee) I miss their cuirosity, the goofiness, their hunger to be read to, the silly dances, the belly juicees and all the rest that would make sane people look at us as if we had lost our mind.
When Josh was so very small and Casey hadn't made his appearance yet, we would find him sitting under a forsythia bush at the back of the yard. He called the bush his recipe and when I asked him why it was called his recipe, he told me quite simply because it was something he made. Such as a recipe. I miss that amazing ability of theirs to put a name to something that, while adults would scratch there head wondering what the heck, made perfect sense if you knew the boys.
When Casey was small and his speech garbled, he was tested by the county and the tester would pull me aside and tell me where he was failing. He had just turned three and the tester told me that Casey held his pen oddly, that he had 7 lines on the letter e when he printed it, and he didn't know the letter Q. When I asked they told me no one had then shown Casey how to hold the pen correctly, asked why there were so many e lines and how often does someone actually NEED a q anyway, I was told no to the first to and got a look for the third. I handed Casey the pen and told him to hold it the grown up way, the way he was "Supposed" to hold it. He did and wrote his name. (He had JUST turned 3) When I asked him about the E he told me that he put those extra lines in it because he liked the way it looked. And then after all of this, the tester tells me that he had scored as high as a 7 year old and would probably have scored higher but that was where the test cut off and she was bugging him about e lines and the way he held his pen? I miss people being amazed by my sons. I miss hugging that to me, of taking pride in what came so easily to them.
Now we are all grown, though I do think the sons are more grown up than I, and it makes me melancholy that I will never be able to hold those hot squirming bodies in my arms, or laugh so hard thatsoda squirted out of our noses which only made us laugh harder. I miss laughing with them.
I guess it's just an old poop sort of day for me. A day when all I have lost overwhelms me and threatens to knock me to my knees.
I know I can't have any of that back but I can wish, can't I?
My favorite time of my life was when the boys were small. Too young, yet for school but no longer babies. The days stretched endlessly before them as they shared their childhood with me. There were days in the sun, days inside, days where we danced and sang and acted silly and days when we sat and created something that was our alone.
I loved the way they smelled after a day in the sun. They smelled of little boy sweat, sunshine and whatever was growing in the herb garden where they liked to sit. They would run and play until it grew too warm and then they would come inside for lunch and a rest before settling down with something in the cool of the house.
I miss that. I miss the curve of Casey's very brown cheek and the softness of his very blonde hair. I loved the lankiness of Josh's little boy body and the sound of his laughter. I loved the way they announced to the world that they were brolees, their word for brothers, and heaven help anyone who came between them.
I miss their giggles. Giggles so powerful that sometimes they couldn't run from me because of those giggles. I miss them powdering themselves and the whole living room with cornstarch in what they called "We Powder Weselves". I miss Casey's foot speaking to me and the notes he would slip under the bathroom door announcing that the ahn-du-nope man was delivering the mail. I miss little kid words frotmockl (motor cycle) Floptopker (helicopter) and Rah nah nee (Fire truck... listen to the sound of the siren rah na nee) I miss their cuirosity, the goofiness, their hunger to be read to, the silly dances, the belly juicees and all the rest that would make sane people look at us as if we had lost our mind.
When Josh was so very small and Casey hadn't made his appearance yet, we would find him sitting under a forsythia bush at the back of the yard. He called the bush his recipe and when I asked him why it was called his recipe, he told me quite simply because it was something he made. Such as a recipe. I miss that amazing ability of theirs to put a name to something that, while adults would scratch there head wondering what the heck, made perfect sense if you knew the boys.
When Casey was small and his speech garbled, he was tested by the county and the tester would pull me aside and tell me where he was failing. He had just turned three and the tester told me that Casey held his pen oddly, that he had 7 lines on the letter e when he printed it, and he didn't know the letter Q. When I asked they told me no one had then shown Casey how to hold the pen correctly, asked why there were so many e lines and how often does someone actually NEED a q anyway, I was told no to the first to and got a look for the third. I handed Casey the pen and told him to hold it the grown up way, the way he was "Supposed" to hold it. He did and wrote his name. (He had JUST turned 3) When I asked him about the E he told me that he put those extra lines in it because he liked the way it looked. And then after all of this, the tester tells me that he had scored as high as a 7 year old and would probably have scored higher but that was where the test cut off and she was bugging him about e lines and the way he held his pen? I miss people being amazed by my sons. I miss hugging that to me, of taking pride in what came so easily to them.
Now we are all grown, though I do think the sons are more grown up than I, and it makes me melancholy that I will never be able to hold those hot squirming bodies in my arms, or laugh so hard thatsoda squirted out of our noses which only made us laugh harder. I miss laughing with them.
I guess it's just an old poop sort of day for me. A day when all I have lost overwhelms me and threatens to knock me to my knees.
I know I can't have any of that back but I can wish, can't I?
Monday, June 18, 2012
The Bluez Again
I hate my brain.
I'm going along easily, not thinking of much of anything when WHAM!! my brain kicks in and suddenly I'm crying or depressed or both. I don't do this to myself, no matter WHAT my husband thinks, it just comes along and smacks me hard.
It hit me on Saturday and when I went to bed Saturday night I slept for 14 hours into Sunday. What a waste of a day off.
I just want to go home and as the builders are ahead of schedule, I find myself even more anxious to get back home. We picked out wall colors on Saturday, bright colors that did not match my mood at all but ones I hope we can live with. I'm impatient to get going and buy furniture and curtains and all the rest. I hate this rental house with its pumpkin room and the bedroom painted a terracotta brown and makes you feel as if you are sleeping in a flower pot. Arrgghhh. The basement is even more depressing and I don't know how Josh stands it.
It's really hard living with things that aren't yours. We own a narrow side table, a four foot table in my craftroom and a card table for Josh. That's it. the rest of the stuff is rented: Bsheets, beds, furniture, dishes. I fret when I see a scratch on the floor, I spaz over a stain on a sheet, I broke a glass and it nearly knocked me to my knees... sheesh. I want to live among stuff that I can destroy if I want and not worry about what will happen when we move.
I am a wreck. I don't know what to do about it. I've tried all of my tricks to divert my thoughts and feelings but have not been successful. So I just bumble along and hope it won't be much longer. I can't wait for the day when I can start packing up my craft stuff to take it all back home.
I am really lucky in my on line friends. They have been so patient with me and my ranblings and have sent craft supplies to make my life easier. I don't know what I would do, if I couldn't make things. Thye may not be great things I make but they do keep me out of trouble and from running the streets with wild men.
I do know that this could all have been worse. I could have lost dogs or people or we could have had NO insurance but, somehow my head doesn't seem to remember that when it plays its nasty games with me. Oh well.
Maybe I'll feel better tomorrow. If not, I'll keep it to myself. Thanks for listening.
I'm going along easily, not thinking of much of anything when WHAM!! my brain kicks in and suddenly I'm crying or depressed or both. I don't do this to myself, no matter WHAT my husband thinks, it just comes along and smacks me hard.
It hit me on Saturday and when I went to bed Saturday night I slept for 14 hours into Sunday. What a waste of a day off.
I just want to go home and as the builders are ahead of schedule, I find myself even more anxious to get back home. We picked out wall colors on Saturday, bright colors that did not match my mood at all but ones I hope we can live with. I'm impatient to get going and buy furniture and curtains and all the rest. I hate this rental house with its pumpkin room and the bedroom painted a terracotta brown and makes you feel as if you are sleeping in a flower pot. Arrgghhh. The basement is even more depressing and I don't know how Josh stands it.
It's really hard living with things that aren't yours. We own a narrow side table, a four foot table in my craftroom and a card table for Josh. That's it. the rest of the stuff is rented: Bsheets, beds, furniture, dishes. I fret when I see a scratch on the floor, I spaz over a stain on a sheet, I broke a glass and it nearly knocked me to my knees... sheesh. I want to live among stuff that I can destroy if I want and not worry about what will happen when we move.
I am a wreck. I don't know what to do about it. I've tried all of my tricks to divert my thoughts and feelings but have not been successful. So I just bumble along and hope it won't be much longer. I can't wait for the day when I can start packing up my craft stuff to take it all back home.
I am really lucky in my on line friends. They have been so patient with me and my ranblings and have sent craft supplies to make my life easier. I don't know what I would do, if I couldn't make things. Thye may not be great things I make but they do keep me out of trouble and from running the streets with wild men.
I do know that this could all have been worse. I could have lost dogs or people or we could have had NO insurance but, somehow my head doesn't seem to remember that when it plays its nasty games with me. Oh well.
Maybe I'll feel better tomorrow. If not, I'll keep it to myself. Thanks for listening.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
WHAT? Two postingz on the same day?
Can't help it. I am so tied in a knot over this fire loss that even thinking of college cannibals has lost it's effect to make me want to giggle.
Now, I know I am organized. maybe overly organized, after all I had inventoried all of my craft supplies and labeled every drawer, plus put like color of beads in their boxes together.
Still I cannot understand why the clerical idiot at the Maryland Insurance Adjusters CANNOT get our loss inventory right.
When I spoke to her boss he told me she was confused as to what was receipts and what was loss. Hmmmm. I guess the LABELS told her nothing. Or the headings on the faxes. The receipts were sent separately from the inventory loss just so I wouldn't confuse anyone. I even printed out items that are craft related and if you aren't a crafter would you really know a rollabind or a xyron? I emailed all 63 pages, only to be told 10 days later that they couldn't open my attachments, so I sent it by fax. And then I'm told it has to be noted as to how old the item is and where it was found in the house. Took me hours to do it, then I faxed it. She emails me the list and everything that I took my time listing was simply lumped under basement. HUH? The the other sons inventory list was missing and we got some story about recipts or somehting. So I spoke to this ninny's boss and we had it all clear on Friday.
Monday I get an email saying I will have the list by 5pm. This morning (Tuesday) I finally get it and it's even MORE SCREWED UP than before. Casey's inventory is missing but the receipts are added to the list. Then the bill for the fiber optic boxes with verizon list quantity one when there were 2 AND she had a copy of the bill. So when I tell her we're coming in tomorrow to get this straight she tells me the boss won't be in. I DON'T CARE. He's not th eone screwing this up, she is.
I have my huge folder full of stuff and copies of the emails sent and I dare her, I just dare her not to be there. This has gone way beyond ridiculous now and while I love a good ridiculous every now and again... not when I'm in danger of having a house done and ready for move in and I have no furniture for it.
Grrrr
Now, I know I am organized. maybe overly organized, after all I had inventoried all of my craft supplies and labeled every drawer, plus put like color of beads in their boxes together.
Still I cannot understand why the clerical idiot at the Maryland Insurance Adjusters CANNOT get our loss inventory right.
When I spoke to her boss he told me she was confused as to what was receipts and what was loss. Hmmmm. I guess the LABELS told her nothing. Or the headings on the faxes. The receipts were sent separately from the inventory loss just so I wouldn't confuse anyone. I even printed out items that are craft related and if you aren't a crafter would you really know a rollabind or a xyron? I emailed all 63 pages, only to be told 10 days later that they couldn't open my attachments, so I sent it by fax. And then I'm told it has to be noted as to how old the item is and where it was found in the house. Took me hours to do it, then I faxed it. She emails me the list and everything that I took my time listing was simply lumped under basement. HUH? The the other sons inventory list was missing and we got some story about recipts or somehting. So I spoke to this ninny's boss and we had it all clear on Friday.
Monday I get an email saying I will have the list by 5pm. This morning (Tuesday) I finally get it and it's even MORE SCREWED UP than before. Casey's inventory is missing but the receipts are added to the list. Then the bill for the fiber optic boxes with verizon list quantity one when there were 2 AND she had a copy of the bill. So when I tell her we're coming in tomorrow to get this straight she tells me the boss won't be in. I DON'T CARE. He's not th eone screwing this up, she is.
I have my huge folder full of stuff and copies of the emails sent and I dare her, I just dare her not to be there. This has gone way beyond ridiculous now and while I love a good ridiculous every now and again... not when I'm in danger of having a house done and ready for move in and I have no furniture for it.
Grrrr
This Ticklez me
I know I shouldn't laugh but I just can't help it but lately, in the news, there has been a story about cannibalism. Seems a Morgan State student was beaten over the head with a baseball bat. Now I would have just taken it as a guy hitting another over the head with a baseball bat but WAIT!! No! We can't have just a case of assault. The reason the batter hit the student is to prepare him for being eaten. Seems the batter claimed that he had eaten someone else not to long ago and, of course, he was tenderizing the student.
What is even funnier, unless you are the battered student, is that the batter was in jail for the first attack and was OUT ON BAIL!! Since prisons are always yapping about over crowding, why not tuck a few cannibals and and among the population and let them take care of the over crowding.
I am sure this is probably a serious matter but this is Maryland for god's sake, 45 minutes to DC and CANNIBALS?????????
When's lunch?
What is even funnier, unless you are the battered student, is that the batter was in jail for the first attack and was OUT ON BAIL!! Since prisons are always yapping about over crowding, why not tuck a few cannibals and and among the population and let them take care of the over crowding.
I am sure this is probably a serious matter but this is Maryland for god's sake, 45 minutes to DC and CANNIBALS?????????
When's lunch?
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Thoughtz
We drove by the house today to admire the windows and found the workers scurrying like ants all over the roof... we're getting a new roof as well.... and I was again amazed at the energy these guys were putting into rebuilding my home.
Now just yesterday I mentioned to the builder (who looks about 12) that I don't care WHAT people say about the hispanics/latinos that come to this country but I have found them to be hard workers and am willing to slap anyone who wants to argue with me. These guys are working their asses off. They all greet me with smiles and a murmured hello and go about their jobs. They do actually eat a lunch, we arrived at their lunch time yesterday but took only a half hour before they were at it again. The builder said that he agrees with my assessment and that the young white guys just don't want ot do that hard of a job but his crew take it all on happily. All legal may I say and taxpayers.
So that dragged my thoughtz to other times when I've seen this ethnic type at work. Take a road grew. Say white guys and blacka nd what do you see? All the guys save one are standing around and watching what one guy is doing. Pass a crew of hispanics (what IS the proper title?) and you see all but one guy working and the guy that isn't working is, in a way, because he is holding the flag.
Not all hispanics etc are hard workers just as all whites aren't but this is what I see and I have noticed. .
So since we really don't hav eany money to tip these guys or buy them lunch (there are 8 of them) I told the builder to tell the guys that if there is anything in the dumpster or in the back yard that can be recycled and put some extra money in their pockets they are to take it with our blessings. I know that all of the old window frames are aluminum so that's a start. I also had a sewing machine that came down from the attic that I have never used and don't know what kind of condition its in. That's been sitting on the porch ever since I left it for trash and I guess that the guys didn't want to throw away something good of mine. I told the builder that if any of the guys want it for his wife etc they could have that as will with the understanding that I have no idea of its condition. Not much but my way of saying thank you.
So still talking about the house, I had pulled out of a magazine this interpretation of Russian kitchen cabinets where each panel of each cabinet sports a different tole painting design. I love the look of that so I cut it out and glues it into m y ever handy notebook. So i scurried up to the builder (who doesn't want us to call him Mister) and told him this is what I wanted... ta da! He took one look, gulped then went white beneath his tan till I took pity on him and told him I was kidding. Cabinets with handles are enough for me.
So then I had another thought... aren't you glad you don't live in my head... that we had a sudden infestation of mice in our house right before the fire and were they all roasted meaning the pull apart the insides guys found all of these little micey bodies or did the mice take a lesson from their rat cousins and desert the house al la Pied Piper fashion. Or did they know earlier than we did that the house was burning and were the first to escape, via the way they got INTO the house. I have a picture in my mind of the two cats zooming out of the house in the midst of a mouse stampede. It was a fire... so why are the mice in my head wearing life jackets?
Sometimes my head makes no sense.
So until the next episode.. Stay odd you little nutballs you
Now just yesterday I mentioned to the builder (who looks about 12) that I don't care WHAT people say about the hispanics/latinos that come to this country but I have found them to be hard workers and am willing to slap anyone who wants to argue with me. These guys are working their asses off. They all greet me with smiles and a murmured hello and go about their jobs. They do actually eat a lunch, we arrived at their lunch time yesterday but took only a half hour before they were at it again. The builder said that he agrees with my assessment and that the young white guys just don't want ot do that hard of a job but his crew take it all on happily. All legal may I say and taxpayers.
So that dragged my thoughtz to other times when I've seen this ethnic type at work. Take a road grew. Say white guys and blacka nd what do you see? All the guys save one are standing around and watching what one guy is doing. Pass a crew of hispanics (what IS the proper title?) and you see all but one guy working and the guy that isn't working is, in a way, because he is holding the flag.
Not all hispanics etc are hard workers just as all whites aren't but this is what I see and I have noticed. .
So since we really don't hav eany money to tip these guys or buy them lunch (there are 8 of them) I told the builder to tell the guys that if there is anything in the dumpster or in the back yard that can be recycled and put some extra money in their pockets they are to take it with our blessings. I know that all of the old window frames are aluminum so that's a start. I also had a sewing machine that came down from the attic that I have never used and don't know what kind of condition its in. That's been sitting on the porch ever since I left it for trash and I guess that the guys didn't want to throw away something good of mine. I told the builder that if any of the guys want it for his wife etc they could have that as will with the understanding that I have no idea of its condition. Not much but my way of saying thank you.
So still talking about the house, I had pulled out of a magazine this interpretation of Russian kitchen cabinets where each panel of each cabinet sports a different tole painting design. I love the look of that so I cut it out and glues it into m y ever handy notebook. So i scurried up to the builder (who doesn't want us to call him Mister) and told him this is what I wanted... ta da! He took one look, gulped then went white beneath his tan till I took pity on him and told him I was kidding. Cabinets with handles are enough for me.
So then I had another thought... aren't you glad you don't live in my head... that we had a sudden infestation of mice in our house right before the fire and were they all roasted meaning the pull apart the insides guys found all of these little micey bodies or did the mice take a lesson from their rat cousins and desert the house al la Pied Piper fashion. Or did they know earlier than we did that the house was burning and were the first to escape, via the way they got INTO the house. I have a picture in my mind of the two cats zooming out of the house in the midst of a mouse stampede. It was a fire... so why are the mice in my head wearing life jackets?
Sometimes my head makes no sense.
So until the next episode.. Stay odd you little nutballs you
Monday, June 4, 2012
Ztuff
We had a hellacious rainstorm the other day where the rain actually came sideways. There was a tornado alert which wouldn't have bothered me if we were home, but I hadn't even thought about finding a safe place in the rental house. The only spot I could find was under the steps in the basement and when I told Old Poop it was the only place because of the location of the furnace and water heater was where the best corner would be and I didn't want to be scalded and or blown up. He blinked and asked if it was the correct corner. Sometimes I swear I exist in only my own mind which would explain why the Old Poop never hears me and all along I thought he was simply ignoring me.
So, if I do exist in my own head, I would like wings, thank you very much.
We took the dogz to the house on Saturday. The minute I told them they were going bye bye the were standing at the back gate and ready to go. We had to wait for the Old pOop to do whatever it is Old PooPs do that takes so long and not once did either dog so much as move a muscle. Collared and leashed we opened the gate and they went right to the car. Charlie sits in the front seat like a person while Kali is a little more restless in the back seat beside me but I noticed that the closer we got to home the more excited she tended to get. She knew we were going home.
We let the dogs in the house so they could see what was going on but the minute little dog next door barked for them, they were out of the house in a flash. We stayed for a long visit and the dogs crashed when we got back to the rental and didn't move. I am really looking forward to that doggy door we are going to get in the basement door. Frankly my legs are killing me from my spectacular fall two saturdays ago and those endless trips up and down the steps from the craft room to let the dogs in and out. They really have been very very good. Better than I have been.
I actually got a bit creative the other day tho I must admit that I kinds copied something I saw on the internet. It's a polymer clay totem kind of figure and when Maureen Carlson made hers, hers were pretty. Mine are oddish, of course. It felt good to finally make something that I like, tho I am not certain that the creativity will hang around. I really do hope so.
No pics... still don't have a camera and no extra $$ right now to buy one. I have a phone that takes pics only I can't seem to take a pic of what I want but have a number of lovely shots of the inside of my purse.
I found a kindred spirit on The Experience Project. Her house fire was the day after mine. She lost her cats and the pics she posted of the remains of her house make me realise how lucky we were. She and I email back and forth sharing our woes etc. It's what I need because I didn't want to keep loading my crap on my friends who have lives of their own and don't have to hear me whine. In fact, I get tired of hearing me whine.
And there is no cheese with that whine either. Or maybe their was and the dogz ate it.
Speaking of ate and eat and eating... I made my first pot roast yesterday. Yes, I'm older than dirt, have been married forever, and never made a pot roast. The Old poop doesn't like pot roast so I don't make it but said the heck with it yesterday and threw a hunk of beef in the crock pot with veggies etc and let it do it's own thing.
Guess what? The Old Poop likes pot roast. So do the dogz who had a feast this morning with bits of fat and potatoes and onions and the juice it all cooked in. Charlie licked his lips so much I'm surprised he didn't lick them right off.
So that's it for Monday in Oddz Bodkinz land. Stay Odd my friendz.
So, if I do exist in my own head, I would like wings, thank you very much.
We took the dogz to the house on Saturday. The minute I told them they were going bye bye the were standing at the back gate and ready to go. We had to wait for the Old pOop to do whatever it is Old PooPs do that takes so long and not once did either dog so much as move a muscle. Collared and leashed we opened the gate and they went right to the car. Charlie sits in the front seat like a person while Kali is a little more restless in the back seat beside me but I noticed that the closer we got to home the more excited she tended to get. She knew we were going home.
We let the dogs in the house so they could see what was going on but the minute little dog next door barked for them, they were out of the house in a flash. We stayed for a long visit and the dogs crashed when we got back to the rental and didn't move. I am really looking forward to that doggy door we are going to get in the basement door. Frankly my legs are killing me from my spectacular fall two saturdays ago and those endless trips up and down the steps from the craft room to let the dogs in and out. They really have been very very good. Better than I have been.
I actually got a bit creative the other day tho I must admit that I kinds copied something I saw on the internet. It's a polymer clay totem kind of figure and when Maureen Carlson made hers, hers were pretty. Mine are oddish, of course. It felt good to finally make something that I like, tho I am not certain that the creativity will hang around. I really do hope so.
No pics... still don't have a camera and no extra $$ right now to buy one. I have a phone that takes pics only I can't seem to take a pic of what I want but have a number of lovely shots of the inside of my purse.
I found a kindred spirit on The Experience Project. Her house fire was the day after mine. She lost her cats and the pics she posted of the remains of her house make me realise how lucky we were. She and I email back and forth sharing our woes etc. It's what I need because I didn't want to keep loading my crap on my friends who have lives of their own and don't have to hear me whine. In fact, I get tired of hearing me whine.
And there is no cheese with that whine either. Or maybe their was and the dogz ate it.
Speaking of ate and eat and eating... I made my first pot roast yesterday. Yes, I'm older than dirt, have been married forever, and never made a pot roast. The Old poop doesn't like pot roast so I don't make it but said the heck with it yesterday and threw a hunk of beef in the crock pot with veggies etc and let it do it's own thing.
Guess what? The Old Poop likes pot roast. So do the dogz who had a feast this morning with bits of fat and potatoes and onions and the juice it all cooked in. Charlie licked his lips so much I'm surprised he didn't lick them right off.
So that's it for Monday in Oddz Bodkinz land. Stay Odd my friendz.
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Neighborz
Just a look at the neighborz in the rental neighborhood.
We have a love seat under the front window when I like to stretch out with my computer on my lap and I can look out the big front window and watch the world go by.
Across the street is Visor Woman. She wear a visor each and every day even when it's cloudy. She one of those skinny old lady types with a cane who mows her lawn every other day. She was even mowing IN THE RAIN with her visor and her ELECTRIC lawn mower. She has a dog, a reddish colored doberman who must be incredibly old or terribly depressed. I have never seen a dog so listless. Anyhow Visor woman... perhaps she should be Vizor woman, doesn't like her next door neighbor Broom Guy. She's always flicking bits of who knows what onto his grass. I'll get to broom guy later. Vizor woman dusts her car each and every day and one day when it was raining she was watering her tree..... her tree's leaves. Yep there she stood, in the rain, hose nozzle raised and, what I can only suspectm was cleaning the leaves of her tree.
Then there is broom guy. I sat there and watched him walk up his walk, unlock his door, set his groceries inside and then spent who know how long, picking who knows what off the bottom of his flip flops. Now the door is open, he's standing in the middle of the door frame flicking stuff off the bottom of his flip flop onto his porch. Once that was done and anything in his bag that was frozen defrosted, he set his clean soled flip flops beside the door, returned outside in a pair of shoes and then swept the bits of whatever off his porch, then off his step, the down the side walk to the gutter where he then swept all the leaves and grass clippings down the gutter and around the corner where he picked up the leavings and dropped it all on HIS next door neighbor's lawn... Invisible Guy! Then Broom man goes back to his porch, where he takes off his shoes puts his flip flops back on and then picks the blades of whatever off the soles of his shoes. Holy mother of god. Yes I sat and watched simply because I could NOT believe it. And just this past Sunday, he apparently couldn't get the whatever off the bottom of his flip flops and became exasperated and threw the both of them into a bush which meant he had to go back into the house to get his shoes.
Invizible guy is just that. His shades never go up or down, I rarely see a light on tho I did see him leave the house once and he cut his lawn once. Other than that INVIZIBLE GUY!!
The next door neighbors of ours are clean freakz. My god, all they seem to do is clean. The old folkz next door on our left wash down their deck and gave us some kind of bleach thing to use on our cement because one of the dogz poop there and who knows what germs with erupt. The younger woman on the other side had a day when everyone was out of her house and she spent it CLEANING!!! There's not so much as a blade of grass out of line. We cut our rental grass but I don't bother weeding the flower beds hoping that Kali and Charlie will run through them enough to wear the weeds down to nothing. Then the household next to younger neighbors has one of those solid prefab white fences that she washed down with soapy water and then rinsed with a hose.
Now, I am not the greatest housekeeper in the world. In fact I wouldn't even consider myself good so you can imagine that these neighborz give me the creeping ghoulies. I want to shout at them to get a life. To do something for themselves that deosn't require bleach or scrubbing or ammonia. Read a book, have a beer, do anything. I think if they ever saw my true lawn at home with the waist high grass, they would faint dead away. Well, maybe not. That would just clutter up the place.
We visited home yesterday to see how far they have gotten on our rebuild. Plumbing is in and has been inspected by the county. We now have a tub only the water hasn't been turned back on. We have a bathroom sink but it's in the dumpster with a big chunk broken out of it.
The electrical boxes are up and most are wired. the doodads for the ceiling fans are in the ceiling and ready for the fans. The rooms are roughed out. The closet in my craft room is going to be much smaller than what it was but it gives me more room. The basement seems larger than upstairs and Josh will have two big rooms, a full bathroom and an ell where he can put a bar if he wants. In face the plumber has run a pipe to that area so that if Josh wants to install a wet bar the pipes are there. Upstairs there is the piping for our automatic ice maker refrigerator. Also the opening for the new sliding doors is cut and ready for them to build our deck.
so that's it from my neck of the woodz.
We have a love seat under the front window when I like to stretch out with my computer on my lap and I can look out the big front window and watch the world go by.
Across the street is Visor Woman. She wear a visor each and every day even when it's cloudy. She one of those skinny old lady types with a cane who mows her lawn every other day. She was even mowing IN THE RAIN with her visor and her ELECTRIC lawn mower. She has a dog, a reddish colored doberman who must be incredibly old or terribly depressed. I have never seen a dog so listless. Anyhow Visor woman... perhaps she should be Vizor woman, doesn't like her next door neighbor Broom Guy. She's always flicking bits of who knows what onto his grass. I'll get to broom guy later. Vizor woman dusts her car each and every day and one day when it was raining she was watering her tree..... her tree's leaves. Yep there she stood, in the rain, hose nozzle raised and, what I can only suspectm was cleaning the leaves of her tree.
Then there is broom guy. I sat there and watched him walk up his walk, unlock his door, set his groceries inside and then spent who know how long, picking who knows what off the bottom of his flip flops. Now the door is open, he's standing in the middle of the door frame flicking stuff off the bottom of his flip flop onto his porch. Once that was done and anything in his bag that was frozen defrosted, he set his clean soled flip flops beside the door, returned outside in a pair of shoes and then swept the bits of whatever off his porch, then off his step, the down the side walk to the gutter where he then swept all the leaves and grass clippings down the gutter and around the corner where he picked up the leavings and dropped it all on HIS next door neighbor's lawn... Invisible Guy! Then Broom man goes back to his porch, where he takes off his shoes puts his flip flops back on and then picks the blades of whatever off the soles of his shoes. Holy mother of god. Yes I sat and watched simply because I could NOT believe it. And just this past Sunday, he apparently couldn't get the whatever off the bottom of his flip flops and became exasperated and threw the both of them into a bush which meant he had to go back into the house to get his shoes.
Invizible guy is just that. His shades never go up or down, I rarely see a light on tho I did see him leave the house once and he cut his lawn once. Other than that INVIZIBLE GUY!!
The next door neighbors of ours are clean freakz. My god, all they seem to do is clean. The old folkz next door on our left wash down their deck and gave us some kind of bleach thing to use on our cement because one of the dogz poop there and who knows what germs with erupt. The younger woman on the other side had a day when everyone was out of her house and she spent it CLEANING!!! There's not so much as a blade of grass out of line. We cut our rental grass but I don't bother weeding the flower beds hoping that Kali and Charlie will run through them enough to wear the weeds down to nothing. Then the household next to younger neighbors has one of those solid prefab white fences that she washed down with soapy water and then rinsed with a hose.
Now, I am not the greatest housekeeper in the world. In fact I wouldn't even consider myself good so you can imagine that these neighborz give me the creeping ghoulies. I want to shout at them to get a life. To do something for themselves that deosn't require bleach or scrubbing or ammonia. Read a book, have a beer, do anything. I think if they ever saw my true lawn at home with the waist high grass, they would faint dead away. Well, maybe not. That would just clutter up the place.
We visited home yesterday to see how far they have gotten on our rebuild. Plumbing is in and has been inspected by the county. We now have a tub only the water hasn't been turned back on. We have a bathroom sink but it's in the dumpster with a big chunk broken out of it.
The electrical boxes are up and most are wired. the doodads for the ceiling fans are in the ceiling and ready for the fans. The rooms are roughed out. The closet in my craft room is going to be much smaller than what it was but it gives me more room. The basement seems larger than upstairs and Josh will have two big rooms, a full bathroom and an ell where he can put a bar if he wants. In face the plumber has run a pipe to that area so that if Josh wants to install a wet bar the pipes are there. Upstairs there is the piping for our automatic ice maker refrigerator. Also the opening for the new sliding doors is cut and ready for them to build our deck.
so that's it from my neck of the woodz.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
The Bluez
I was doing so well with this whole house thing but suddenly this morning I am so down in the dumps there's three miles of garbage piled on top of me.
I have no patience, I never have and this whole house rebuild, while speeding along isn't speeding along fast enough for me. I've been in the row house for more than a month and it STILL feels as if I'm in a hotel someplace. It's not mine. Not the furniture, not the pictures, not the pots or the pans or the silver or the shower curtain or the rugs on the floor. None of it is mine and it weighs on my mind whenever something gets scratched or dented or spotted and I suck at housework.
I want to go home. To my little little blue house where I can be me and can relax. Where I can have what little I have around me. I want it NOW! In my best Baruca Salt manner. I want to go home. My home. NOW
I have no patience, I never have and this whole house rebuild, while speeding along isn't speeding along fast enough for me. I've been in the row house for more than a month and it STILL feels as if I'm in a hotel someplace. It's not mine. Not the furniture, not the pictures, not the pots or the pans or the silver or the shower curtain or the rugs on the floor. None of it is mine and it weighs on my mind whenever something gets scratched or dented or spotted and I suck at housework.
I want to go home. To my little little blue house where I can be me and can relax. Where I can have what little I have around me. I want it NOW! In my best Baruca Salt manner. I want to go home. My home. NOW
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Is it July yet?
The builders are galloping toward finishing the house in July. Of course, we then have to have the county come in an inspect and who knows how long that will take. I'm trying to NOT get too excited for fear that something will happen and I won't be in my house in July. That would bruise an already broken heart.
The row house is nice. The neighbors are nice. The little boy next door just thinks I am the greatest thing since pizza mostly, I think, because I use the word poop and he thinks that hysterical. Of course, he's only about 2 but it is nice to have a fan.
I think the reason I don't like the row house is because I can't make it mine and I am itching to make something mine. I've poster tac'd things to the wall in the craft room and have my table there so messy it looks almost like home except for those Pumpkin eater walls. I put up some removable wall stickers downstairs which helps a bit. I never realized before this how important it is to me to put my stamp on things.
I found some great fabric that I want to use in the house. I'm thinking of making my own bed head board using that fabric, stuffing and some beading but I can't even work on that, because I don't know how big a bed I am getting. The bedrooms are small at home and so I thought a full or maybe a twin, but a twin might be too small and I'll spend the rest of my life falling out of bed.
Speaking of falling.... sigh... gravity will never be my friend. I was being silly Friday night and making fart sounds with my bare feet on the wooden floors when suddenly I'm face down on the floor with no sensation of actually falling. Michael AKA the old Poop yelled "Oh my god!" and then he and Charlie were there each trying to push the other aside. I managed to get myself up but OUCH!!!. So I was hobbling all weekend nearly in tears when I had to climb the stairs in the row house. Even my hands hurt to the point where I had to cancel claying with my neighbors, something I was looking forward to for days, nor could I walk well. So despite the holiday I went no place for those three days and I still hurt. I have promised the oLd Poop and myself that I will make no more floor fart noises. I make no promises however about any other fart noises.
I think I have the house colors chosen. I'm talking interior. Old Poop says Josh can pick the siding color and, knowing Josh, he'd pick purple. I'm still waiting for Ikea to send me a catalog so I can look at furniture. Hey, I'm ready to get moving and don't want to wait until the last minute.
What will I do when house fire/rebuild is no longer in my head, when all is done and we are settled again? I suppose I'll have to find another obsession. I obsess so well.
So that's it for now. Thanks for coming along on the ride with me. As bumpy as it is.
The row house is nice. The neighbors are nice. The little boy next door just thinks I am the greatest thing since pizza mostly, I think, because I use the word poop and he thinks that hysterical. Of course, he's only about 2 but it is nice to have a fan.
I think the reason I don't like the row house is because I can't make it mine and I am itching to make something mine. I've poster tac'd things to the wall in the craft room and have my table there so messy it looks almost like home except for those Pumpkin eater walls. I put up some removable wall stickers downstairs which helps a bit. I never realized before this how important it is to me to put my stamp on things.
I found some great fabric that I want to use in the house. I'm thinking of making my own bed head board using that fabric, stuffing and some beading but I can't even work on that, because I don't know how big a bed I am getting. The bedrooms are small at home and so I thought a full or maybe a twin, but a twin might be too small and I'll spend the rest of my life falling out of bed.
Speaking of falling.... sigh... gravity will never be my friend. I was being silly Friday night and making fart sounds with my bare feet on the wooden floors when suddenly I'm face down on the floor with no sensation of actually falling. Michael AKA the old Poop yelled "Oh my god!" and then he and Charlie were there each trying to push the other aside. I managed to get myself up but OUCH!!!. So I was hobbling all weekend nearly in tears when I had to climb the stairs in the row house. Even my hands hurt to the point where I had to cancel claying with my neighbors, something I was looking forward to for days, nor could I walk well. So despite the holiday I went no place for those three days and I still hurt. I have promised the oLd Poop and myself that I will make no more floor fart noises. I make no promises however about any other fart noises.
I think I have the house colors chosen. I'm talking interior. Old Poop says Josh can pick the siding color and, knowing Josh, he'd pick purple. I'm still waiting for Ikea to send me a catalog so I can look at furniture. Hey, I'm ready to get moving and don't want to wait until the last minute.
What will I do when house fire/rebuild is no longer in my head, when all is done and we are settled again? I suppose I'll have to find another obsession. I obsess so well.
So that's it for now. Thanks for coming along on the ride with me. As bumpy as it is.
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Tuezday
We stopped at the house yesterday to see what had been done and when I walked into the door the place seemed oddly bright even tho the only light coming in was from the opened kitchen door. yesterday, however I could see everything right to the back of the house. All the interior wood had been sprayed with something white and I'm sure that helped along with the fact that there are no walls except the exterior ones.
I stood there for the longest time, my mind trying to tell me something but failing and then the old Poop speaks up and says "It's so small".
BINGO! Was my house ALWAYS that small or perhaps it was only to be dry cleaned and it shrunk under the weight of the water pumped in by the fire department? This house is smaller than the town house, much smaller. Do I care? I've lived in it for 30 years and never noticed it was SO SMALL but the yard is SO BIG plus there will be a deck and we're getting someone to dig up the bamboo rapidly approaching the house and then will spread wildflower seeds all over the churned up yard for next spring. Imagine me sitting on my deck overlooking the wildflowers and the dogs with enough bamboo left to make their life interesting as they explore the yard each morning.
So now I'm thinking I've been getting myself all topsy turvey over refurnishing the house for nothing. The house is small so how much do I need? Whew.. one thing off my mind. Now if only I had an ikea catalog then I could have my house furnished at least in my head. Of course, I have to wait till the insurance company pays off, hopefully it won't be too long.
So that's it for the Tuezday catch up on the great house rebuild of 2012. What will I have to angst over once it's done? I'm sure I will find something.
At least my life isn't boring but, to tell the truth, I think I would enjoy boring, if just for a bit.
Boredom, bring it on.
I stood there for the longest time, my mind trying to tell me something but failing and then the old Poop speaks up and says "It's so small".
BINGO! Was my house ALWAYS that small or perhaps it was only to be dry cleaned and it shrunk under the weight of the water pumped in by the fire department? This house is smaller than the town house, much smaller. Do I care? I've lived in it for 30 years and never noticed it was SO SMALL but the yard is SO BIG plus there will be a deck and we're getting someone to dig up the bamboo rapidly approaching the house and then will spread wildflower seeds all over the churned up yard for next spring. Imagine me sitting on my deck overlooking the wildflowers and the dogs with enough bamboo left to make their life interesting as they explore the yard each morning.
So now I'm thinking I've been getting myself all topsy turvey over refurnishing the house for nothing. The house is small so how much do I need? Whew.. one thing off my mind. Now if only I had an ikea catalog then I could have my house furnished at least in my head. Of course, I have to wait till the insurance company pays off, hopefully it won't be too long.
So that's it for the Tuezday catch up on the great house rebuild of 2012. What will I have to angst over once it's done? I'm sure I will find something.
At least my life isn't boring but, to tell the truth, I think I would enjoy boring, if just for a bit.
Boredom, bring it on.
Monday, May 21, 2012
Yet another rebuild update
According to Josh, aka oldest son, the interior of the house no longer smells like the inside of a grill. Some kind of gray substance has been sprayed onto the existing wood and new sub flooring is down and the wall studs are in waiting for insulation and dry wall. Do they put insulation between dry wall and the exterior, I don't know, all I care is that the stud beams are a good sign.
Today is the plumber who will replace all the pipes, which have already been stripped from the house and then the electrician. I just cannot believe how fast this is going. I've picked counters and counter tops, no stone, thank you, and most of the room colors and have figured out the we want a water thing and an ice maker on the door of the fridge. Maybe I should be more particular but a fridge is a fridge and a stove a stove and the lest I have to fart around with it the better. Same for the washer and dryer. Unless the washer gathers up the clothes it washes then hands it off to the dryer and then the dryer folds and puts everything away then the simpler the machine the better.
I also do not care what kind of knobs are on things or finishes or the grain in the wood. All I care about it the colors. I have some screwy color ideas too but I wouldn't want to drive the men crazy with girly decorations and colors.
If the workers keep up this pace and things we need to order come in time, we may be in my mid-july as the builder is saying now.
I've just turned in the corrected inventory and a running total of our paper receipts. Now we wait and see how much they gave us. Serv Pro gave us a list that added up to more than we are insured for so I am hoping for that full amount. We need everything.
This has been an adventure, not one I wish to repeat. Good things have happened too. Friends have gifted me with so much craft stuff that I am as happy as a pig in slop. If I could get inspired that would be great but maybe that has to wait until I get back home. Just Saturday, I was in my favorite store ARTWAY in Damascus and the wonderful clerk there... we always chat away like two old friends... heard my tale of woe, gave me a hug and slipped a little something in my bag... a gift certificate for $55.00!!! Hotchie Mama! I'll wait till they get into their new premises and then go spend. Cashiers in MIchaels have given me a small discount, other people have offered anything I need. It's hard to accept, since I am always trying to give, I suppose I have to learn to receive as well. It's just too danged hard.
Speaking of pigs reminded me that we passed a sign yesterday that offered lambs for sale (pigs, lambs, farm animals) and I could just see the look on the neighbors of the rental house's faces if I came in carrying a lamb. It is a cute idea and would give Kali something to herd but sheep are really rather dim and I don't know if the cute factor would outweigh the dumb factor. Still.... lambs. Something to think about. baaaaaaaaa
Today is the plumber who will replace all the pipes, which have already been stripped from the house and then the electrician. I just cannot believe how fast this is going. I've picked counters and counter tops, no stone, thank you, and most of the room colors and have figured out the we want a water thing and an ice maker on the door of the fridge. Maybe I should be more particular but a fridge is a fridge and a stove a stove and the lest I have to fart around with it the better. Same for the washer and dryer. Unless the washer gathers up the clothes it washes then hands it off to the dryer and then the dryer folds and puts everything away then the simpler the machine the better.
I also do not care what kind of knobs are on things or finishes or the grain in the wood. All I care about it the colors. I have some screwy color ideas too but I wouldn't want to drive the men crazy with girly decorations and colors.
If the workers keep up this pace and things we need to order come in time, we may be in my mid-july as the builder is saying now.
I've just turned in the corrected inventory and a running total of our paper receipts. Now we wait and see how much they gave us. Serv Pro gave us a list that added up to more than we are insured for so I am hoping for that full amount. We need everything.
This has been an adventure, not one I wish to repeat. Good things have happened too. Friends have gifted me with so much craft stuff that I am as happy as a pig in slop. If I could get inspired that would be great but maybe that has to wait until I get back home. Just Saturday, I was in my favorite store ARTWAY in Damascus and the wonderful clerk there... we always chat away like two old friends... heard my tale of woe, gave me a hug and slipped a little something in my bag... a gift certificate for $55.00!!! Hotchie Mama! I'll wait till they get into their new premises and then go spend. Cashiers in MIchaels have given me a small discount, other people have offered anything I need. It's hard to accept, since I am always trying to give, I suppose I have to learn to receive as well. It's just too danged hard.
Speaking of pigs reminded me that we passed a sign yesterday that offered lambs for sale (pigs, lambs, farm animals) and I could just see the look on the neighbors of the rental house's faces if I came in carrying a lamb. It is a cute idea and would give Kali something to herd but sheep are really rather dim and I don't know if the cute factor would outweigh the dumb factor. Still.... lambs. Something to think about. baaaaaaaaa
Thursday, May 17, 2012
Thurzday
This morning, those guys who come around every week to steal your trash showed up. Charlie was having none of it. It is HIS trash goddamit so leave it alone. He made his intentions known, however, the fierceness was somewhat muted by the catfood can he had in h is mouth and refused to put down. Charlie likes to eat al fresco and especially likes to lick the juice from a cat food can. kali likes cat food juice as well so whoever gets the can first holds onto it. despite the fact that the slowpoke to the can gets a bit of catfood instead of just juice, the juice is the prize. Idiot dogz.
And speaking of idiotz. I was watching Toddlers and Tiaras last night. Yes I know, little girls parading around dressed like miniature hookers and shaking their money makers in inappropriate ways for four year olds. Anyhow, there was one family who, or is that whom, I wanted to smack silly. Not only did they have no idea of the use of apostrophe esses, as if "she MY daughter" but their english was so bad, they had to close caption it so we could understand them. Oh no, they weren't emigrants, they were americans but dumb americans. Ok so if that wasn't bad enough, the theme of the pagent was around the world and the girls were supposed to represent individual countries. Al little four year old had Portugal and part of her skit involved bull fighting. There is bull fighting in Portugal, in fact they don't kill the bulls only really piss them off. I wondered then, how many people knew that there was bullfighting in Portugal and was rather impressed that the mother knew. But then we got to She my daughter and can you guess which country she chose? Africa. AFRICA as in the continent of and I'm guessing that She my DaughterAXually thought that Africa was a country. Good god in heaven. MOm... spend some of that time you wasted by arguing with your sistah as to who's routine was the best and get you some EDDICation. Africa, my dear god.
House update, the badly burned joists at the back of the house have been replaced and a floor is in. A plumber comes out Monday to run the pipes, followed by an electrician. Josh was at the meeting with Michael and the builder and filled me in on some things. the basement door will be steel because it will cut better to install the doggie door, the BIG doggie door. We had the dogz with us when we first met with the builder and now he knows how big they are.
We area almost done with our inventory and the tallying of the receipts and I am trying hard to keep my patience in explaining things over and over again to the old Poop. but really... three times in one short conversation. Maybe I should send him an email.
I got a little panicy last night thinking about all we have to get for the house, plus we need to give the sons the money for their losses and I desperately need dentures (hence the pig pic on my Facebook page) and the old Poop wants to go to the ocean in the summer and us with no vacation money. Old Poop tells me that I'll worry myself into an early grave. I don't do this to myself on purpose. It's as if I'm going along all nice and cheery and a nasty little gnome creeps up on me, whispers dire things into my ear, bops me on the head and runs off... giggling and cavorting while I lie sleepless, my gut in a knot. I'm going to catch that creepy gnome guy one of these days and squash him flat. All I need is a gnome gnet. Anyone have one they want to use or should I maybe order one from that country known as Africa.
It's a wonder I can still pass for sane.
And speaking of idiotz. I was watching Toddlers and Tiaras last night. Yes I know, little girls parading around dressed like miniature hookers and shaking their money makers in inappropriate ways for four year olds. Anyhow, there was one family who, or is that whom, I wanted to smack silly. Not only did they have no idea of the use of apostrophe esses, as if "she MY daughter" but their english was so bad, they had to close caption it so we could understand them. Oh no, they weren't emigrants, they were americans but dumb americans. Ok so if that wasn't bad enough, the theme of the pagent was around the world and the girls were supposed to represent individual countries. Al little four year old had Portugal and part of her skit involved bull fighting. There is bull fighting in Portugal, in fact they don't kill the bulls only really piss them off. I wondered then, how many people knew that there was bullfighting in Portugal and was rather impressed that the mother knew. But then we got to She my daughter and can you guess which country she chose? Africa. AFRICA as in the continent of and I'm guessing that She my DaughterAXually thought that Africa was a country. Good god in heaven. MOm... spend some of that time you wasted by arguing with your sistah as to who's routine was the best and get you some EDDICation. Africa, my dear god.
House update, the badly burned joists at the back of the house have been replaced and a floor is in. A plumber comes out Monday to run the pipes, followed by an electrician. Josh was at the meeting with Michael and the builder and filled me in on some things. the basement door will be steel because it will cut better to install the doggie door, the BIG doggie door. We had the dogz with us when we first met with the builder and now he knows how big they are.
We area almost done with our inventory and the tallying of the receipts and I am trying hard to keep my patience in explaining things over and over again to the old Poop. but really... three times in one short conversation. Maybe I should send him an email.
I got a little panicy last night thinking about all we have to get for the house, plus we need to give the sons the money for their losses and I desperately need dentures (hence the pig pic on my Facebook page) and the old Poop wants to go to the ocean in the summer and us with no vacation money. Old Poop tells me that I'll worry myself into an early grave. I don't do this to myself on purpose. It's as if I'm going along all nice and cheery and a nasty little gnome creeps up on me, whispers dire things into my ear, bops me on the head and runs off... giggling and cavorting while I lie sleepless, my gut in a knot. I'm going to catch that creepy gnome guy one of these days and squash him flat. All I need is a gnome gnet. Anyone have one they want to use or should I maybe order one from that country known as Africa.
It's a wonder I can still pass for sane.
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Tra La
Going to post house newz here from now on. I don't want to be a pest to my big list. So here goes.
The house may be rebuilt sooner because Michael and I have our minds made up on what we want and don't want and aren't nitpicking over knobs and grains and the like. In fact, I have already picked out my kitchen cabinets as well as the color of the counter tops. I don't want stone, laminate is fine with me. Josh and a buddy will be doing our floors so I don't have to pick the color right away but I know what I want. I also have the kitchen wall color picked out and I thought I had the rest of the rooms but Michael didn't like the green I chose for the living room and wanted the bedroom peach instead. So I'll put the green in my bedroom and Michael can choose the color for his. (we both snore terribly and keep each other awake so separate bedrooms work for us) Michael said he wanted maroon walls. I told him it would look like living inside a mouth. Add white valances on the top and bottom and they would look like teeth and he'd really be living in a mouth.
There will be ceiling fans in all rooms and a deck, that we never had before and will have to be built at an odd angle to accomodate the outside steps to the basement. There will be a new roof, but we have to pay for that but we should have money left over from contents. There will be a dog door in the basement and a bay window for them in the living room because the dogz have fallen in love with the bay window in the rental house and sleep sprawled across the sill like gigantic cats.
I get a BIG closet in the craft room and the builder will even build me some shelves. I'm thinking a light turquoise for that room but haven't decided for certain.
Oh and did I tell you that the front and back will be landscaped close to the house? Can you imagine? Now I just have to wait for it all to be done.
Another bit of good new is that the builder said that the tear it all away in the interior guys who dismantled walls etc, worked faster than he had planned and that is why we may be back home sooner. Good. My dogz need to run
We took the dogz home on Saturday to let them run and, hopefully, poop them out. No sooner were we in the yard when the little dog next door told his people that the dogz were here and he had to GO!! Eventually little dog next door came over with his mother and he was beside himseld with joy. Little dog next door is a shi tzu mix and has always seemed undoglike to me. He seems a solemn little soul who would rather view life than jump into it and get his paws muddy. Boy was I wrong. Little dog next door teased Charlie into playing iwth whimpers and that upraised butt posture that means come on and play. Little dog next door had never been in my yard before, nor in our bamboo and he had a grand time. Then when he was done, he simply went home, with me following him so no one hit him with a car. Besides, I also had to open the gate for him. We're thinking now that we should but a gate in the fence between us, so the dogs can visit back and forth. Kali was so excited to see the next door neighbor that she peed herself and Charlie used his girl voice as he proclaimed his love. Yep, a gate ought to do it. So that's where we are now. I'm not going to get my hopes us about us getting into the house sooner than we thought, tho it is hard to not get excited. All I know is that I want to go HOME.
The house may be rebuilt sooner because Michael and I have our minds made up on what we want and don't want and aren't nitpicking over knobs and grains and the like. In fact, I have already picked out my kitchen cabinets as well as the color of the counter tops. I don't want stone, laminate is fine with me. Josh and a buddy will be doing our floors so I don't have to pick the color right away but I know what I want. I also have the kitchen wall color picked out and I thought I had the rest of the rooms but Michael didn't like the green I chose for the living room and wanted the bedroom peach instead. So I'll put the green in my bedroom and Michael can choose the color for his. (we both snore terribly and keep each other awake so separate bedrooms work for us) Michael said he wanted maroon walls. I told him it would look like living inside a mouth. Add white valances on the top and bottom and they would look like teeth and he'd really be living in a mouth.
There will be ceiling fans in all rooms and a deck, that we never had before and will have to be built at an odd angle to accomodate the outside steps to the basement. There will be a new roof, but we have to pay for that but we should have money left over from contents. There will be a dog door in the basement and a bay window for them in the living room because the dogz have fallen in love with the bay window in the rental house and sleep sprawled across the sill like gigantic cats.
I get a BIG closet in the craft room and the builder will even build me some shelves. I'm thinking a light turquoise for that room but haven't decided for certain.
Oh and did I tell you that the front and back will be landscaped close to the house? Can you imagine? Now I just have to wait for it all to be done.
Another bit of good new is that the builder said that the tear it all away in the interior guys who dismantled walls etc, worked faster than he had planned and that is why we may be back home sooner. Good. My dogz need to run
We took the dogz home on Saturday to let them run and, hopefully, poop them out. No sooner were we in the yard when the little dog next door told his people that the dogz were here and he had to GO!! Eventually little dog next door came over with his mother and he was beside himseld with joy. Little dog next door is a shi tzu mix and has always seemed undoglike to me. He seems a solemn little soul who would rather view life than jump into it and get his paws muddy. Boy was I wrong. Little dog next door teased Charlie into playing iwth whimpers and that upraised butt posture that means come on and play. Little dog next door had never been in my yard before, nor in our bamboo and he had a grand time. Then when he was done, he simply went home, with me following him so no one hit him with a car. Besides, I also had to open the gate for him. We're thinking now that we should but a gate in the fence between us, so the dogs can visit back and forth. Kali was so excited to see the next door neighbor that she peed herself and Charlie used his girl voice as he proclaimed his love. Yep, a gate ought to do it. So that's where we are now. I'm not going to get my hopes us about us getting into the house sooner than we thought, tho it is hard to not get excited. All I know is that I want to go HOME.
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
I wonder why...
things that happen to strangers affect me so. I remember reading in a newsletter from Animal rescue about a man who had lost his job and was to become homeless. He made arrangements for his beloved cats to go Animal Rescue and then the man killed himself. I suppose he felt that he had no other options. I can understand that. I've felt that way myself at times so maybe I just empathize with the total hopelessness of it all.
Today Dooce posted about a tweet she received about a man she follows who may be in serious trouble only to have a follow up tweet sometime later stating that this man, too had killed himself. She posted some of his other tweets and my heart bled for the man. If only he had someone who could have taken him into their arms and told him everything might be bleak but he would get through it. Even it if wasn't true and things would never really get better maybe the hope would have given him strength.
For decades we had been in danger of losing our home. I worked full time for years and the husband tutored but we never made enough and I spent those years scared to death of losing the home and having us out on the street. By us, I mean the sons who were little then and depending on their parents for everything. How much easier it would have been if someone, somehwere would have told me that if the worst did happen, we would NOT be homeless, that there was a place for us to go, it would have made things easier for me. I still would have worked but the fear would have been kept somewhat at bay.
This is why I have always told my sons that when they do move out and if something happens and they need to come back home, they are always welcome. Of course, right now I don't have a real home just a rental one but it is a safety net... just in case.
So if anyone out there in blog reader land ever needs a safety net., look no further. I'm here, arms open wide, ready to catch you.
Today Dooce posted about a tweet she received about a man she follows who may be in serious trouble only to have a follow up tweet sometime later stating that this man, too had killed himself. She posted some of his other tweets and my heart bled for the man. If only he had someone who could have taken him into their arms and told him everything might be bleak but he would get through it. Even it if wasn't true and things would never really get better maybe the hope would have given him strength.
For decades we had been in danger of losing our home. I worked full time for years and the husband tutored but we never made enough and I spent those years scared to death of losing the home and having us out on the street. By us, I mean the sons who were little then and depending on their parents for everything. How much easier it would have been if someone, somehwere would have told me that if the worst did happen, we would NOT be homeless, that there was a place for us to go, it would have made things easier for me. I still would have worked but the fear would have been kept somewhat at bay.
This is why I have always told my sons that when they do move out and if something happens and they need to come back home, they are always welcome. Of course, right now I don't have a real home just a rental one but it is a safety net... just in case.
So if anyone out there in blog reader land ever needs a safety net., look no further. I'm here, arms open wide, ready to catch you.
Monday, May 7, 2012
Peter Peter Pumpkin Eater
Had a wife and couldn't keep her
Put her in a pumpkin shell
and there he kept her
very well.
Yep, the rental house craft room fits this kid's rhyme perfectly.
The orange room as driving me mad. The table I was using in it was too small and I was so frustrated. This weekend we got me a five foot long table, that folds in the middle that JUST about fits the room and makes crafting so much easier. I think I can now stand the room until September, now if I had some inspiration.
Still working on that god awful inventory list. Everytime I sit to go over it again I'm reminded of what I will never have back. The first issue of KIdstreet News that I had written for. The article about Casey and his group that won the International Film Festival in D.C., the Star trek phone prize I won for Josh, and everything I had ever written since I was in the first grade. I wrote my first story the summer after first grade. It was about a kitten who was lost and who ended up being adopted by a mother rabbit and her hairless newborns. The new born rabbits loved the little black kitten. He had fur the bunnies didn't.
I never stopped writing from then on. I realize now it was an escape from a harmful childhood. It wasn't so much physical abuse, tho the belt was taken to me twice, but the emotional abuse that left me feeling as if I am a waste of skin and totally useless. In my writing I could be anyone. I could do anything and so I wrote and wrote and wrote... and lost all of it.
I shouldn't let this loss bother me and it usually doesn't but there are times it hits me so hard that it brings tears to my eyes but I don't cry. I tell myself the people and animals are safe and what more do I want?
So I take a breath and I go on. A bit wobbly but I go on.
On the up side. I looked at all my craft stuff that was sent to me and that which I bought as replacement and have come to a realization. I really don't need any more. Oh maybe a bottle of rubber cement or tape or something like that but no stamps or stamp pads or pape4r and the rest. I can quite happily craft with what I have.
As for clothes I have enough shirts and pants for 6 days at work and enough at home relaxed clothes for about that same time and that's enough as well. Shopping for replacement etc has shown me something I never noticed before. I keep buying the same stuff over and over. Round necked or v necked t-shirt either short or long sleeved and a pair of jeans. I look at blouses and the like but I buy the t-shirts, long sleeved and short. Different colors and patterns of course but the same style over and over. So I am now done buying replacement clothes for summer. No more clothes shopping, something that make me want to jump, ok hobble, for joy! I even have 2 count em 2 pairs of sneakers. one for winter one for summer. I just hope that nothing comes up where I have to be an adult and 'gasp' wear a dress and/or heels. Then I'm lost. For now, tho, it's one less thing I have to fuss with. Who needs the rest of the stuff? the books and pigs and knick knacks and all? Oh yes I liked what I had but now I can buy new, if I even bother. So while m y head tends to drag me down at times, reality pulls me back up and then the oddz bodkinz part of my life steps in and I walk out into the back yard and find Kali sitting in the middle of a bush and grinning like a fool. How could anyone be down with a bush sitting dog? Charlie wisely stays out of the bushes but he does love to sleep in the living room's bay window. Just like a cat only the cat, I do have, doesn't like to sit in the window.
ODDZ BODKINZ FOREVER!
Put her in a pumpkin shell
and there he kept her
very well.
Yep, the rental house craft room fits this kid's rhyme perfectly.
The orange room as driving me mad. The table I was using in it was too small and I was so frustrated. This weekend we got me a five foot long table, that folds in the middle that JUST about fits the room and makes crafting so much easier. I think I can now stand the room until September, now if I had some inspiration.
Still working on that god awful inventory list. Everytime I sit to go over it again I'm reminded of what I will never have back. The first issue of KIdstreet News that I had written for. The article about Casey and his group that won the International Film Festival in D.C., the Star trek phone prize I won for Josh, and everything I had ever written since I was in the first grade. I wrote my first story the summer after first grade. It was about a kitten who was lost and who ended up being adopted by a mother rabbit and her hairless newborns. The new born rabbits loved the little black kitten. He had fur the bunnies didn't.
I never stopped writing from then on. I realize now it was an escape from a harmful childhood. It wasn't so much physical abuse, tho the belt was taken to me twice, but the emotional abuse that left me feeling as if I am a waste of skin and totally useless. In my writing I could be anyone. I could do anything and so I wrote and wrote and wrote... and lost all of it.
I shouldn't let this loss bother me and it usually doesn't but there are times it hits me so hard that it brings tears to my eyes but I don't cry. I tell myself the people and animals are safe and what more do I want?
So I take a breath and I go on. A bit wobbly but I go on.
On the up side. I looked at all my craft stuff that was sent to me and that which I bought as replacement and have come to a realization. I really don't need any more. Oh maybe a bottle of rubber cement or tape or something like that but no stamps or stamp pads or pape4r and the rest. I can quite happily craft with what I have.
As for clothes I have enough shirts and pants for 6 days at work and enough at home relaxed clothes for about that same time and that's enough as well. Shopping for replacement etc has shown me something I never noticed before. I keep buying the same stuff over and over. Round necked or v necked t-shirt either short or long sleeved and a pair of jeans. I look at blouses and the like but I buy the t-shirts, long sleeved and short. Different colors and patterns of course but the same style over and over. So I am now done buying replacement clothes for summer. No more clothes shopping, something that make me want to jump, ok hobble, for joy! I even have 2 count em 2 pairs of sneakers. one for winter one for summer. I just hope that nothing comes up where I have to be an adult and 'gasp' wear a dress and/or heels. Then I'm lost. For now, tho, it's one less thing I have to fuss with. Who needs the rest of the stuff? the books and pigs and knick knacks and all? Oh yes I liked what I had but now I can buy new, if I even bother. So while m y head tends to drag me down at times, reality pulls me back up and then the oddz bodkinz part of my life steps in and I walk out into the back yard and find Kali sitting in the middle of a bush and grinning like a fool. How could anyone be down with a bush sitting dog? Charlie wisely stays out of the bushes but he does love to sleep in the living room's bay window. Just like a cat only the cat, I do have, doesn't like to sit in the window.
ODDZ BODKINZ FOREVER!
Monday, April 30, 2012
Dogz
I wonder if we tend to adopt odd dogs or do they become odd once they become ours.
Case in point, Charlie and Kali. He the size of a lion, she of a mixed heritage of what has to be two of the most obscure breeds.
Charlie has taken to sleeping in the bay window in the living room of the rental house. Like a cat, only Charlie must be 100 pounds or more. It's the silliest thing to see this big old beast snoozing away as peaceful as can be.
Kali has not avoided the odd either. First she climbed a tree when she lived with Charlie and Josh at the neighbor's house till we found a place for all of us. Climbed a tree and sat in the crotch of that tree grinning like a fool. We have no idea WHY she climbed the tree only that she did.
There's no tree in the yard of the rental house. There is hardly any yard at all but there are two bushes and Kali perches right in the middle of one of the bushes as if sitting in a nest. I think she does that to stay away from Charlie.
Both dogs love bubble wrap and envelopes from China. Just china... not Israel or Great Brittan or Canada but China. I've just discovered that they can play for the longest time by themselves with something as simple as a tennis ball carrying it up the steps then letting it go watching it bounce down the steps, step by step, till it's nearly at the bottom then whoosh down the stairs and into a mouth.
There is a new thing that is happening. Josh works nights now, coming home sometime around 11. If I should be in the craft room upstairs and Michael decides to go to bed, the dogs come get me, so I can go downstairs with them and open the front door so they can sit at the storm door and wait. It didn't dawn on me one night when Kali came up to get me and I tried to shoo her away. She went, returned with Charlie who took my wrist in his mouth and then gently led me downstairs to the door. I'm not about to leave the inner door open and the storm door unlocked while upstairs so I settle with them and wait.
Now if I could only teach them to do housework, life would be perfect.
Case in point, Charlie and Kali. He the size of a lion, she of a mixed heritage of what has to be two of the most obscure breeds.
Charlie has taken to sleeping in the bay window in the living room of the rental house. Like a cat, only Charlie must be 100 pounds or more. It's the silliest thing to see this big old beast snoozing away as peaceful as can be.
Kali has not avoided the odd either. First she climbed a tree when she lived with Charlie and Josh at the neighbor's house till we found a place for all of us. Climbed a tree and sat in the crotch of that tree grinning like a fool. We have no idea WHY she climbed the tree only that she did.
There's no tree in the yard of the rental house. There is hardly any yard at all but there are two bushes and Kali perches right in the middle of one of the bushes as if sitting in a nest. I think she does that to stay away from Charlie.
Both dogs love bubble wrap and envelopes from China. Just china... not Israel or Great Brittan or Canada but China. I've just discovered that they can play for the longest time by themselves with something as simple as a tennis ball carrying it up the steps then letting it go watching it bounce down the steps, step by step, till it's nearly at the bottom then whoosh down the stairs and into a mouth.
There is a new thing that is happening. Josh works nights now, coming home sometime around 11. If I should be in the craft room upstairs and Michael decides to go to bed, the dogs come get me, so I can go downstairs with them and open the front door so they can sit at the storm door and wait. It didn't dawn on me one night when Kali came up to get me and I tried to shoo her away. She went, returned with Charlie who took my wrist in his mouth and then gently led me downstairs to the door. I'm not about to leave the inner door open and the storm door unlocked while upstairs so I settle with them and wait.
Now if I could only teach them to do housework, life would be perfect.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
And so it continues
I sometimes wonder why I have an Oddz Bodkinz kind of life. Do other people have such strange things happen around them or do I just notice it more than others? Of course, I have had stranger things than usual. A short list is I went to high school with a guy who ended up as a mummy on a mountain. Another young man I worked with died suddenly and haunted the workplace. I lived in a haunted house and now work in a haunted building. I was in a bank robbery and we chased another batch of bank robbers decades later. Then there was the serial killer who live down the street and the fire in my house and my ongoing adventure trying to get my life back in order.
Then there are the winged things and the double digits that I don't even WANT to think about, except that it had started again.
Now this.........
I knew Christine Jarrett. We weren't close friends or anything, but volunteer mothers in our oldest sons classes. She was always happy, always smiling an loved her sons with a fierceness that was beautiful to be seen and then she disappeared, walked out on her husband 21 years ago with $4,000 in her pocket. It made no sense. She would never leave her boys. But Christine was gone and has been gone all this time. I've checked the missing persons sites over the years, the Charlie Project, Porchlight International, things like that as well as the Maryland Missing Person's website etc. I would look at her smiling face in her oversized glasses and pray deep in my soul that Christine would come home someday soon.
It was impossible for Christine to come home since she never really left spending the last 21 years buried under the shed in her back yard. The husband raised the sons in that house, steps from their mother's body. The police claim that they hadn't enough evidence to go any further than a missing person's report all those years ago but we who live in Elkridge know how little the county and the police think of us.
This has hit me hard. I suppose I don't want to give up the dream that Christine will come home to her boys. .Rest well Christine.
Then there are the winged things and the double digits that I don't even WANT to think about, except that it had started again.
Now this.........
I knew Christine Jarrett. We weren't close friends or anything, but volunteer mothers in our oldest sons classes. She was always happy, always smiling an loved her sons with a fierceness that was beautiful to be seen and then she disappeared, walked out on her husband 21 years ago with $4,000 in her pocket. It made no sense. She would never leave her boys. But Christine was gone and has been gone all this time. I've checked the missing persons sites over the years, the Charlie Project, Porchlight International, things like that as well as the Maryland Missing Person's website etc. I would look at her smiling face in her oversized glasses and pray deep in my soul that Christine would come home someday soon.
It was impossible for Christine to come home since she never really left spending the last 21 years buried under the shed in her back yard. The husband raised the sons in that house, steps from their mother's body. The police claim that they hadn't enough evidence to go any further than a missing person's report all those years ago but we who live in Elkridge know how little the county and the police think of us.
This has hit me hard. I suppose I don't want to give up the dream that Christine will come home to her boys. .Rest well Christine.
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